The Local La Push Soap Opera
by The Fair Ophelia
Summary: The only female werewolf EVER. How much does that suck? And as if my life didn't suck enough, I had to imprint. Could my life get any worse? Apparently so. A Leah Clearwater story
1. Teen Angst

Life sucks and then you die.

Yeah, I should be so lucky.

Chapter 1

Teen Angst is so Cliché But it's Not Like I can Get Rid of it

The only female werewolf in existence. The only one. That's me. What's _wrong_ with me? I know the others hate me, think I'm annoying. Here comes Leah and her angst again. But I can't help it. What am I supposed to do when we share thoughts? It's not like I can keep it hidden.

I am so pathetic. If there ever was a more pathetic human being than me, I would like to meet this person. We would probably get along. We could have a party together.

Why did Sam even invite me? I thought sourly as I sifted through my clothes looking for something appropriate to wear. He knows I'll only spoil the party. And he probably didn't even want me there anyways.

It was probably Emily who asked him to. Emily who still tried to be my best friend, even after everything that had happened between us. She had even asked me to be a bridesmaid at her wedding. As if I could stand there and watch Emily marry the man I was in love with. It was too much. I know she was trying to be nice, but still. I couldn't do it.

"Leah, time to go," Seth called from the bottom of the stairs. "If we get there late, all the food will be gone!"

I rolled my eyes. Was food _all_ that boys thought about?

"Coming," I yelled down. I threw on a red knit sweater over my black lacy tank top, and surveyed myself in the mirror. Not awful. That was the best that could be said about me right now. I dragged a brush through my cropped, chin-length hair, and hurried down the stairs.

I had to admit, one of the major downsides to being a werewolf was that I couldn't grow my hair long. I knew it looked much prettier when it was long. Long hair took away the sharp angles of my face and made me look more feminine, more soft. But you can't have too long of hair when you're a wolf. It makes your wolf coat shaggy too. And then it gets caught in things and then it's just a mess. So short it is. I know short hair makes me look like a boy, but what does that matter? I'm only part of the pack anyhow.

Seth was waiting impatiently at the front door, coat already on. Little brothers are so annoying.

"About time," he said, nearly bouncing with excitement. I sighed. Seth loved Christmas, but to be honest I found it a bit of a trial. Especially now that Mom was living with Charlie Swan. It meant all sorts of family things.

It was cold, but not biting outside. Not like my temperature wasn't much hotter than a normal human's anyways. Seth and I trudged through the snow. I refused to drive to Sam's house when it was only just around the corner, but I hadn't factored in a foot and a half of snow. Seth and I walked single file in someone's tire tracks.

This sucked. This sucked so badly. Being forced to see Sam at any time knowing that he didn't love me any more sucked. But seeing Sam and Emily radiantly happy in their tiny, cheerful house, seeing Emily six months gone with Sam's baby, seeing the look of adoration Sam always reserved just for Emily, that hurt more than usual.

Some way to spend Christmas. I scowled at the thought.

"This is going to be great, isn't it?" Seth asked.

I grunted.

"Ah, come on, Leah. Cheer up. It's a Christmas party," Seth said, frowning at my lack of enthusiasm.

I sighed.

"Whatever, Seth. I'm coming, aren't I? Just don't ask me to be all happy and cheerful or anything."

"_Nobody's_ asking you to be that," Seth muttered under his breath.

We were getting near to Sam's house. It looked like a freaking Christmas card. Tiny cottage backed by snow-covered woods, soft piles of snow all around, more falling in gentle drifting flakes. The house itself was warm and inviting looking, with a Christmas tree right in the middle of the front window, its lights shining, the ornaments sparkling. There was even a small brown bird perched on the roof next to the chimney, from which a think curl of smoke was going up. It was perfect. Sam's life was perfect. So where did that leave me?

There had been a time when Sam loved me. I know there was. I could remember it. We were together for two years, and they were the happiest years of my life. Sam had just graduated from high school, and we spent every minute in each other's company. I could still remember the soft, adoring look on his face when he danced with me at my senior prom, and whispered in my ear that he loved me. I could still remember the warmth that had flowed all through me, the joy I felt, how I wanted to be with him every moment of every day, forever.

And then, the fateful day came. It was Christmas, just like this. I had been gushing to my best friend and cousin Emily about Sam ever since we had started dating, but she'd never met him. She was coming for Christmas, and I couldn't wait to introduce her to my wonderful boyfriend. If I had know what would happen, I would have done everything in my power to keep those two from ever meeting. The minute they locked eyes, that was it. I was history. Sam barely remembered my name. From love-of-his-life-on-the-verge-of-engagement to… daily reminder of pain and annoyance.

I guess it was better that he had met Emily then, instead of at my wedding or something. _That_ would have been some sort of scandal. My groom leaving me at the alter for my maid of honour. Not that that could have hurt any worse than this.

And the worst part of it was, Sam knew that I wasn't over him. Before I left his pack for Jacob's he knew everything. Every thought I had about him while in wolf form. Every bit of anger and hurt and pain, he knew about. And there wasn't anything he could do about it. Emily was his destiny. He could no more do without her than a flower could do without rain. They belonged together.

And where did that leave me? Out in the cold. Bitter, annoying, sour Leah that nobody wanted around. I knew I had made myself like that, but I couldn't help it. At least now I didn't have to hear Sam's thoughts, and he didn't have to hear mine. Thank God for Jacob and his alternate pack. Not that hanging around the Cullens all the time was very much fun, but it was better than listening to Sam think about Emily. Anything was better than that.

Seth rang the doorbell, and Emily answered.

I had to admit, she looked beautiful, even with the scars that raked across half her face. After three years, they were faded now, not so red and obvious. And somehow even with them they didn't detract from her beauty. She was radiantly glowing, one hand on her bump, which was just beginning to get round.

"Seth! Leah! Come on in!" she said with a huge smile.

Seth bounced in, and I shuffled after him, wishing I wasn't here. Wasn't it enough that I had to live every day knowing that Sam didn't love me? But I tried to shake off those thoughts. Just for one day. For Emily.

I drew in a deep breath.

"Hey Emily," I said as I passed her.

"Hey Leah," she said gently.

I shrugged out of my coat and she took it.

"Merry Christmas," I said, half heartedly.

"Merry Christmas," she said back, a wide smile forming on her face.

"Hey, Em, do we have any more… oh, hey Leah," Sam walked into the tiny hallway. He nearly filled up the whole space, he was so big. As per usual when he was around, my heart sped up to an uncomfortable staccato rhythm. I cursed myself. It just wasn't _fair_. Why couldn't I get over him? Why?

"Hey Sam," I said, trying to make my voice sound neutral.

"Everyone else is in the living room," Sam said to me, giving me a sympathetic smile. I know he could hear my heartbeat. He was sympathetic to my feelings, really he was. He just couldn't do anything about it. I bit back a grimace.

"Thanks," I said, slipping past him and trying not to let our bodies touch anywhere. It was a useless effort. The hallway was just too small, and Sam was too huge. My side brushed against his as I squeezed past, my hand skimming over his bare arm. Immediately, it felt as if my arm was on fire. My skin sang where it had touched his, and I bit my lip, fighting back tears.

The house was so small, I wasn't sure how it fit so many hulking teenage werewolves. Seriously. If Sam wanted to have any more of these gatherings, he was going to have to buy a bigger house. Seth was already draped across the sofa when I walked in, sitting beside Nessie Cullen. Of course, Jacob was somewhere near.

Nessie was technically only three years old, but she looked thirteen or fourteen. Still in the gangly, slightly awkward early teen stage. But you had to hand it to Jacob: she was already breathtaking. Pale skin with a rosy undertone, luminous brown eyes framed with long lashes, and rusty red curls that hung down her back in that messy tangle that boys find so alluring.

"Leah!" she cried, jumping off the couch as she caught sight of me. She was so graceful in all her movements, something she must have picked up from her bloodsucker relatives. She ran over to me and flung herself in my arms.

I smiled slightly, and hugged her back. I may not like the Cullens, but it was pretty hard not to like Nessie, never mind the fact that whenever I'm in Jake's head he's thinking about her.

"Hey kid. You grew since last I saw you or what?" I asked.

Nessie wrinkled her nose. It was a joke between us. Every time I saw her I asked whether she had grown any, since it was more than likely that she had.

"You saw me yesterday, Lee," she said, using her nickname for me.

"I know. But you've probably grown another foot since then or something," I said.

Nessie rolled her eyes.

"Sure sure," she said, using one of Jake's favorite phrases.

I looked around the rest of the tiny room. Every available surface was covered in giant, hulking boys. Even the floor.

Quil and Embry were in the corner playing with Quil's imprint, a five year old Claire who seemed totally delighted with the Christmas tree. I waved to them, since with Jacob and Seth they were the rest of my pack. Paul was there making goo-goo eyes with Jake's sister Rachel. Ewww. Gross. Jared, his imprint Kim, Colin, Brady, Alex, and Tom were all involved in a very serious discussion about an upcoming snowball fight. Alex and Tom were 15, and the youngest of Sam's pack. Still, they were just as huge as the rest of the boys.

I sat down on the floor next to Jake. He shuffled over to make more room for me, and Nessie shifted as well, so that once again she was directly behind him. I fought the urge to roll my eyes. Imprinting was so… melodramatic. Destiny and all that crap. Whatever.

"Hey Leah," Jake said, smiling at me.

I felt my spirits lift just a little bit. Jake had, shockingly, become a friend since I joined his pack. He and I both knew what it was like to have the person you loved choose someone else. Course he was over that now that he had imprinted on Nessie. But still. It was nice to have someone who knew how that felt.

"Hi ya, Jake," I said, trying to sound cheerful.

Jacob frowned, and I could tell that he knew I was faking this. He nodded towards the knot of snowball fight- planners.

"You gunna join?" he asked.

I shook my head.

"No way. Too cold."

He smiled crookedly.

"I thought that didn't bother you any more," he teased.

"Yeah well I don't like being wet either," I shot back, but I couldn't help a small smile. It was easy to joke with Jacob. He was a good guy. Plus, it helped that I was his 'beta' as Bella had once called me. It gave us a sort of connection that the others didn't have.

"You ready, guys?" Sam asked popping his head into the living room.

He looked so handsome, his hair tousled with a few snowflakes still glistening in them, warm colour behind his russet cheeks, his eyes sparkling with mischief. It was the Sam that I remembered. The Sam that would get that look in his eye before he pulled me off to see some waterfall he'd found behind a rock formation, or showed me a particularly lovely sunset. I willed my heart to stop aching.

There was a general cheer from everyone. This was obviously the signal they had been waiting for. There was a mass exodus to the door to grab hats and coats for those that needed them. Being a werewolf had its advantages. One of them being a loss of the need for warm clothing. We ran pretty warm as it was.

Seth jumped up too.

"Coming, Nessie?" he asked.

Nessie shook her head.

"I think Jake and I are going to stay here. We played in the snow at my house."

Jake grinned.

"Play? Is that what you call it? Your Uncle Emmet nailed me in the head. _Hard_."

"You deserved it," Nessie reminded him.

"Nobody deserves getting ganged up on by a psychic and a mountain!" Jake objected.

"You have to be sneaky around Aunt Alice. You know that already," Nessie reminded him.

"Yeah well it doesn't help she gets Emmet to do her dirty work. Could he _get_ any bigger?" Jack groused.

"K, bye," Seth called over his shoulder as he ran out to join the others. It was best to leave Jack and Nessie to their bickering once they got started.

Quil and Claire were colouring in the middle of the floor now, but other than that the room was pretty empty. I looked over at the general mess of the food table and shook my head.

"Want some help, Emily?" I asked.

Emily looked up, surprised.

"Sure, Leah. Sure. Can you help me clear this all away?" she spread her hand over the table.

"Sure." I started bringing paper plates to the kitchen.

"They sure make a mess, don't they?" I joked half heartedly.

Emily laughed.

"They sure do. Honestly, sometimes I feel like their mother."

I smirked.

"If I was their mother I would discipline them better," I returned.

Emily grinned, and a spark of our old camaraderie came back, if only for a fleeting moment. Emily seemed to notice it too, and her eyes glowed with warm expectancy.

I turned away from it, from the hope in her eyes. We might have shared this one moment, but that didn't mean we were friends again. Not by a long shot.

The sink was already full of warm, soapy water, and I thrust my hands in, washing the dishes that were stacked on the counter.

"Thanks. That's a huge help," Emily said behind me.

"No problem. Better than snowball fighting with the boys. They're probably killing each other by now."

Emily laughed again.

"Probably. It's easy to forget, because they're all so big, but they're really just boys, aren't they?"

I smirked.

"Yup."

We tidied in silence while I tried not to resent Emily. It was hard. It seemed like she had everything. A house, a family, a life. A new baby on the way. It felt as though everything she had should have been mine. It should have been me humming slightly as I cleared away the table, my hand unconsciously flitting to the roundness of my unborn child every once in a while. It should have been me glowing with happiness and expectancy. Heck, I would even take the scars if it meant I could be happy.

I silently cursed myself for going down this path_ again_. Hadn't I agonized enough about this? Shouldn't I be getting over Sam and moving on by now? There had to be something wrong with me, I decided. I must enjoy torture or something.

It surprised me when all the dishes were gone. There had been such a giant mound of them, and I hadn't been paying attention as I washed. I checked my watch. A half hour I had been washing, and I didn't even notice.

I looked around. Emily was sitting on the floor playing with Claire while Quil and Jake laughed and joked, and Nessie looked slightly bored. I smiled grimly, leaning on the counter.

"Well that's a joke, isn't it?" I said softly to myself.

"What's a joke?" asked a voice behind me. I whirled around, and my world stopped turning.

_Author's Note: Wow. A Twilight fic. To be honest, I never thought I would write one. I wanted to see what all the fuss was about with these books. So I just finished listening to them last week (yes, listening. The audiobooks are on Youtube) and one of the parts I really liked in Breaking Dawn was in the insight into Leah's character. I really feel sorry for her. _

_I was really, really happy that we got to hear part of Breaking Dawn from Jacob's perspective. I pretty much love Jacob. And I was fascinated by his interaction with Leah. And that's when this plot bunny appeared. And never went away. _


	2. Couldn't Have Seen that One

Chapter 2

Couldn't Have Seen That one Coming if I Could See for a Million Miles

It was as if ever since I lost Sam to Emily my world had been in fragments, and the fragments scattered over a million, million miles. Everything was just confusing and bitter and wicked painful. It was as if there was no sun in my sky any more, and I was having to make due with a constant drizzle.

Until I saw him.

I turned, and suddenly it was as if the fragments flew back and came together with a resounding _crash!_ As if everything was suddenly right in the world. As if the sun had just burst forth in all its glory, and there were no clouds any more. It was disorienting and heady and dizzying.

Suddenly, it didn't matter that Sam as with Emily. It didn't matter that I was the only female werewolf _ever_. It didn't matter that I was a biological dead end, a freak among freaks. None of it mattered except _him_.

He smiled at me, and I could almost feel the warmth of it on my skin.

"Hi," he said. His voice was a deep bass, strong and masculine. I felt slightly faint. His features were familiar, but I was sure I would have remembered him anywhere. How could anybody forget that level of handsomeness?

"Um. Hi," I managed. I was in shock. I was in a daze. He was… and then…! Wow.

He smiled again uncertainly.

"You probably don't remember me. I'm Steve Uley. Sam's brother."

Oh. _Oh_.

Steve, Sam's older brother. Of course he was familiar. I'd seen him before, tones of times. He had always sort of been there in the background. The quiet, bookish brother. He had been away at university most of the time Sam and I had been dating.

I struggled to pull some coherent thoughts together. He must think I was an idiot!

"I'm… ah… Leah. Leah Clearwater."

He held out his hand, and I hesitantly shook it. The places our skin touched burned, like nothing I'd ever felt before. It was a spark like an electric shock pulsing through me.

"Yeah, I remember," Steve said, dropping my hand. "You used to date Sam."

The sudden reminder that Sam used to love me should have hurt. But I barely registered it.

"Yeah. A while ago. Before he met Emily." There. That seemed like a coherent sentence. I felt absurdly pleased with myself.

"I was sorry I wasn't back for their wedding. I was in at a conference in England, and couldn't get back in time,"

I remembered, belatedly, that Steve was one of those fancy, private school teachers.

"It was a nice wedding," I murmured, not remembering till after I had said it that I hadn't even been there. I had stayed home, so as not to ruin Emily's big day. My wedding present to Sam.

Steve scrutinized my face.

"Are you ok? You look a little flushed. Do you want to sit down or something?"

A look of concern washed over his features. I must have looked more dazed than I felt.

"Um, yeah, maybe I should sit down. I'm feeling a little lightheaded," I said. He grasped my forearm, and led me to a chair. Gently, he placed a hand on my forehead.

He hissed in surprise.

"You're burning up!" he exclaimed.

I shook my head.

"I run hotter than normal. It's nothing weird," I said.

"Then what's wrong?"

I shook my head again, trying to clear it. I knew what had just happened – I'd seen it in enough of the others' heads to know. I could just hardly believe it.

"I think I just need a moment to readjust my perspective on life," I mumbled.

Steve was gone, and then returned with a glass of water.

"Here, see if that helps," he said.

"Really, I'm fine," I said, but I took the water. Actually, it helped.

"Drink the whole thing, slowly," he instructed.

"What are you, a doctor?" I asked.

He smiled.

"I know drinking something never hurts."

I utilized the time it took the drink the water to peek over the edge of the glass and study him. I could tell that he and Sam were related. They had the same almond shape to their eyes, the same quirk to their smiles. Steve even had the same sort of easy-going demeanor that Sam usually exuded, although Sam's was contrived, and I knew that he had worked very hard on it after he had hurt Emily. Steve's relaxed manner seemed to be natural. He was nearly as tall as Sam, but slighter, less burley. He looked like he would be more comfortable in a library than running around chasing vampires, although he was still muscular, I could see under his brown long-sleeved t-shirt. On his straight nose rested a pair of black-rimmed glasses that gave him a scholarly look.

"Feeling better?" he asked, as I drank the last of the water.

I nodded.

Wow. So this is what it felt like. I never thought that imprinting would happen to me. And to be honest I wasn't sure that it could. After all, if Sam was right and imprinting was a way to pass on the werewolf gene, and I wasn't even sure if I could do that, then why would I imprint? And this was like nothing, _nothing_ I had ever felt before. This was like… like… like I was put back together again. Like just looking at him made life ok again. It was like every cliché in the book about love at first sight, right in front of me.

I shook my head, trying to clear it of these strange thoughts, and Steve watched me with a curious expression on his lean face.

"I guess you weren't feeling well enough to join the snowball fight," he said, nodding towards the window. "I just came back from it. Those kids are insane."

I nodded, a small smile forming on my face.

"Let me guess," I said. "They play dirty."

"Actually, yes. I was hiding in the trees and it seemed like they could hear me breathing. Three of them ganged up on me and tackled me to the ground before stuffing snow down my jacket. I'd had enough after that and came in to get warm."

I grinned. Using werewolf senses against someone who didn't have them was cheating. He had guessed right, they _could _hear him breathing. That and his heart beating. It wasn't hard to hear it now, actually, if I concentrated on it. I tried not to get distracted.

"I hang around with those guys too much," I said, thinking of my pack as I answered his original question. "I don't need to give them an excuse to whip ice balls at me."

Just then, Nessie gave out a peal of laughter at something Jake had said. Her laughter was like silver bells tinkling through the still air, and Steve and I both turned just in time to see her beautiful face alive with amusement.

"She's a pretty little kid, isn't she?" Steve said.

I looked at Nessie, and nodded. She was more than pretty. Even in her pre-adolescent state, she was beautiful. Stunningly so.

"I don't remember her being here before," Steve continued. "And you'd think I'd remember someone like that. Did she just move here?"

My mouth quirked into a smile.

"The Cullens have been here for a while," I replied.

Steve looked startled.

"She's a Cullen? As in, Dr. Carlisle Cullen? She's _his_ kid?"

"Not his kid," I corrected. "His granddaughter. She's Edward Cullen's niece. He adopted her when his biological brother died in a car crash." I gave the public story that everyone was supposed to know, instead of the truth. I didn't think he was ready for that yet.

"What's her name?" He asked, curiously.

I felt a stab of irrational irritation and jealousy. Both emotions I was all too familiar with. Why was he so interested in Nessie? I mean, I know she's beautiful, even so young, but he was supposed to be paying attention to _me._ I stifled my anger. That wasn't fair to him. He was probably just curious. After all, who wouldn't be curious about Nessie?

"Renesmee," I said drawing out the long and ridiculous name. Really, what was Bella thinking? I mean, I know she was pretty out of it when Nessie was born, but _Renesmee_? Not a name you would want to curse any child with. Even Jake, who was crazy about Nessie in every way imaginable still thought her name was dumb. 'a bit of a mouthful', he has said. It certainly was that.

"Renesmee Cullen," I continued. "But we usually call her Nessie."

"How old is she?" Steve asked.

I counted in my head, trying to remember how old she was supposed to be now. It's not like I could just come out and say three.

"Twelve or thirteen, I think. Jake's really good friends with her mom, so he usually looks after her. She's sort of an honourary member of the gang."

Steve looked over at Jacob's huge form.

"He's a babysitter?" he asked, amused by the thought.

Wouldn't Jake just _love_ to be called Nessie's babysitter? I thought, grinning.

"Well he and Ness are pretty good together. They're darn near inseparable these days."

Steve's eyebrows knit together.

"Isn't that a little bit weird?" he asked.

I shrugged. I had actually never thought of what it would have looked like from someone outside: Nessie being just a kid, and Jake looking like he could be in his late twenties, even though he was still only nineteen.

"Nessie's really grown up for her age." That was an understatement!

Before he had time for any more questions, the door opened and Sam came in, shaking water from his hair.

"You missed a good fight, Steve," he called. "We pummeled 'em good." Sam trooped into the kitchen, laughter in his eyes. Which halted when he saw Steve sitting beside me.

"Hey Leah, you ok?" he asked, his face worried.

Steve answered for me.

"She said she was feeling a little faint. But it seems like everything's ok now. Right, Leah?"

He turned his full attention to me once more, and I felt the warmth of his gaze. I lapped it up, like a thirsty person on a hot day.

"I'm fine, really," I said, looking at Sam but speaking to Steve.

Sam's eyebrows knit together the same way Steve's did. It must be a family trait.

Steve smiled at me, and placed a hand on my arm in a comforting gesture. My heart rate sped up again.

Sam's eyes widened. There was no way he had missed that. He looked from me to Steve, and then back again. Then realization flooded over his features. He stood frozen, dumbstruck, for a long minute. Then, after a few awkward seconds, he seemed to regain his composure.

"Leah? Can I talk to you for a minute?"

No, I wanted to snap. Go away. Haven't you caused enough trouble in my life? But I bit my tongue. Sam didn't need yet another reminder of how much he had screwed me over.

"Um. Sure, Sam."

I lurched unsteadily to my feet, and Steve shot out a stabling hand. His smile made me feel warm right down to my toes.

"Steady there," he said softly, almost like a caress. I fought back a shiver at the intimate note in his voice.

I didn't want to leave him. I didn't want to let him out of my sight. I wanted to go on sitting beside him forever while we talked about nothing. Once, I would have treasured any time alone with Sam, but now this was just a bother that pulled me away from Steve. Whatever Sam had to say, I wished he would just stuff it.

With one regretful glance over my shoulder, I walked away with Sam. He led me into his and Emily's tiny bedroom. This fact once would have wounded me. Now I couldn't care less where I was, only that I was away from _him_.

"What, Sam?" I asked, crossing my arms defensively as he shut the door behind him. Prying werewolf ears and all that. Not that they all wouldn't know eventually.

"It's happened, hasn't it?" Sam asked, searching my face.

I felt a blush rise in my cheeks. Was I really that easy to read? Maybe to Sam.

"And if it has?" I asked, sounding harsher than I felt.

"Has it?" Sam asked again.

I sighed, and ran a hand through my short hair.

"_Yes_, ok Sam? Yes, I imprinted. Happy?"

A huge smile broke out over Sam's features, making them radiant.

"Yes. So much, Leah!" He grinned, and I couldn't help but smile back at his expression. His eyebrow quirked up. "But to my brother?"

"I know," I said ruefully. "This wasn't what I expected to happen when I came here today."

"No kidding," Sam agreed.

"No offence, Sam, but shouldn't Jacob be the one having this conversation with me?" I said. "You're not my Alpha after all."

"I know," Sam replied. "I may not be your Alpha any more, but Steve's my brother. And I recognized that look on your face right away."

"What look?" I asked.

"That look you used to give me," Sam said quietly.

We both winced.

"Well you don't have to worry about that any more. I'm not going to go running after you any more," I said firmly.

Sam put a huge, warm hand on my shoulder.

"I'll be glad to have you as my sister, Leah," he said softly.

I snorted.

"Isn't that jumping the gun a little bit?"

"Destiny, remember?" Sam said.

I rolled my eyes.

"Yeah, whatever. Listen, I would appreciate it if you not say anything just yet. I wanna tell my pack first before all the others know." I saw the worried shadow in his eyes. "Except Emily of course," I amended.

The shadow disappeared.

"Thanks. You know how much I hate keeping secrets from her."

"Yeah, yeah, I know, destiny," I grumbled. Then I looked up at him. "You don't care that it's your brother?" I asked, a little hesitantly.

"I want you to be happy, Leah," he said sincerely. And I believed him. It seemed strange, after all the hurt that he had caused me, but I could see that he was in earnest. He really truly wanted me to be happy. Weird.

My surprise must have shown on my face, because he gave me a wry smile.

"I know you don't think that I do, but really, I do."

I shrugged.

"Guess it doesn't matter any more," I said.

There was a knock on the door.

"Sam, are you in there?"

Sam cleared his throat.

"Yeah, Em, I'm here. Just… ah… changing my shirt."

"Ok, but hurry back. We're opening presents soon."

"Thought we weren't doing that till after," Sam replied.

"Yeah but it's almost time for Claire to be home, and Quil wants her to be here for that."

Sam and I traded amused glances.

"Imprints," we whispered at the same time.

_Author's Note: Don't you guys just love Steve, Sam's bookish brother? I'm kinda jealous of Leah: I want that guy! LOL. Why Sam's brother? Well I have a theory about that, but you're going to have to wait till next chapter to hear all about it. _

_Thanks to everyone who reviewed the previous chapter. It's a good motivator to write more :-) This story is a lot of fun to write. I love Leah's attitude. So surely and sour, but really it's because she's unhappy and lonely. _

_The coolest thing happened to me while I was taking the bus home for Christmas. The girl sitting across the aisle from me was reading 'Twilight'. I normally don't talk to people but this time I thought 'why not'? So I started talking 'Twilight' with her, and we didn't stop for the entire 5 hour trip. It was great! Twilight really does bring people together, LOL. _


	3. If Jacob could Possibly Remember

Chapter 3

If Jacob Could Possibly Remember that He's my Pack Leader, Not my Father

"Leah, we really should get home," Seth said. "It's getting late."

I checked my watch, surprised. I knew that it had gotten dark a while ago, but to be honest I had lost track of the time. It was almost seven. I was slightly shocked. Where had the time gone?

I had spent the entire party talking to Steve. I could talk to him forever. He was witty and intelligent and sweet and kind and… adjectives failed. Pretty dang amazing.

"Time for you to go already?" Steve asked, looking as disappointed as I felt.

A shot of something warm and fluttering went straight to my stomach.

I got up, unwilling to leave his company and the warm glow of Sam's living room.

"Can I walk you to your car?" Steve asked.

I ducked my head, slightly embarrassed.

"Actually, I walked. My house isn't far."

"Oh. Well then allow me to walk you home," Steve offered.

I could feel myself blushing harder. Truth be told, I didn't want to let him out of my sight. Today might turn out to have been just a dream, and when I woke up I would be back to Leah the total outcast who nobody wanted around.

I shrugged into my coat, glad I had worn my nice one. Cream wool that fell to my knees with a big belt around my waist that made me look like I had a figure. Seth was already walking ahead, pointedly not paying attention to Steve or I.

The night was lovely. Cold and clear, with so many stars above and crunching snow beneath. Someone had plowed the road from Sam's house while we had been at the party, so we didn't have to walk single file in tire tracks. Steve walked beside me.

I looked up, and my breath caught in my throat as I saw the shining blanket of stars stretched out above me.

"Beautiful," I breathed, my breath coming out in a puff of smoke.

Steve smiled.

"I never figured you for one of those girls who likes the night," he said softly. "You seem to me like a child of the sunlight, warm and bright."  
I was glad that the darkness covered my blush. Me, warm and bright? That was a joke. But he was sweet to have said it.

"'I have been one acquainted with the night'" I quoted. I was thinking of those superstitions involving werewolves and full moons. Considering we weren't actually werewolves, but shape-shifters who happened to turn into wolves, it didn't apply. But still, it was hard not to think of myself as a werewolf, and all the stuff that went along with it.

Steve grinned at my comment.

"Didn't take you for a poetry girl either. Robert Frost?"

I nodded.

"We studied him in high school."

"'The woods are lovely, dark and deep.'" Steve quoted under his breath. "'But I have promises to keep. And miles to go before I sleep. And miles to go before I sleep.'"

I grinned at him.

"You're good at this."

He shrugged.

"I did some Lit in college."

I nodded. My house was coming into view, and I tried to push it further back by the sheer force of my mind. I didn't want to be parted from Steve. Not ever. Not even for the night, even though I knew that I would end up at Sam's house tomorrow. I begrudged every step, because it shortened our time together.

"Well, here I am," I said hesitantly, as I stood on the porch.

Steve stood very close to me, his face illuminated by the porch light. Seth had got home before us. He was so close that for one heady second I thought he was going to kiss me. Instead, he raised an arm, and brushed my cheek.

"'Two roads diverged in a yellow wood and I, I took the one less travelled by. And that has made all the difference,'" he whispered. His breath fanned out across my cheek, making my colour rise once again. I stared into his eyes, forgetting for a second that really, we had only just met. I wanted so much to kiss him. He was looking into my eyes as well, a small smile playing on the corners of his lips.

Abruptly, he dropped his hand, and turned.

"Goodnight, Leah," he said, and walked away.

"Goodnight," I whispered, knowing that he couldn't hear me.

I stood, frozen, on my own doorstep for a long moment, trying to collect my scattered wits. It seemed like they were strewn from Sam's house to mine, and it was difficult for me to gather them back up.

I knew that I had to go inside eventually, or I would freeze to death. A low rumble told me that I would also starve to death if I didn't eat something as well. With a shake of my head, I walked inside.

As soon as I got in the door, Seth was there, looming in front of me.

"Spill," he said.

I scowled.

"Go away, Seth."

He shook his head.

"You can tell me now, or I can overhear when you tell Jacob later."

I gritted my teeth.

"Is Jacob coming?" I asked, fighting to keep my voice level

"He wants to talk to you. Like he wouldn't notice how you acted today at the party. He's coming over as soon as he drives Nessie home. He said to consider this your warning."

I felt the hot bubble of rage slide down my spine. My hands started shaking, and I clenched them into fists to stop them. There was no way I was ruining my favorite coat because I couldn't control my temper. Why was any of this Jacob's business anyways? Why did he have to be so darn nosy?

Seth held out his hands in front of him, as if to shield himself from my inevitable explosion into a werewolf.

"Don't give me that look," he said. "It's not my fault."

I growled under my breath.

"Why does Jacob think he has to know everything about my life?" I demanded, already knowing why.

Seth rolled his eyes.

"Come on, Leah. Don't be stupid. He's the Alpha. Whatever happens to the pack is his business. He needs to know if there's going to be a problem."

"It's not a problem," I said, lying through clenched teeth. Of course it was a problem. I had imprinted. On what plane of existence could that not be a problem? I just wasn't ready to tell Jacob about it yet.

"So are you going to tell me or not?" Seth asked, the eager took returning to his face. "I'm going to know eventually anyways."

And he was right. The worst thing about being in a pack was that everyone could hear everything. No secrets. I sighed, feeling the anger drain away from me. It didn't do any good to be angry anyways. I didn't want to share my secret with Jacob or the rest of the pack, but they would know as soon as I phased. It wasn't like I could keep my mind on anything else but Steve for very long.

"You can hear with Jake hears. I don't want to say this twce. I don't even want to say it once."

Seth grimaced.

"Fine, whatever. Keep your secrets for a little bit longer."

He bounded up the stairs, two at a time.

I took off my coat., and trailed to the kitchen, pulling ingredients for spaghetti out as I walked past. Cooking always helped me think more clearly. Everything was so much simpler when all I had to worry about was to watch my teaspoons and tablespoons. Besides, food was always a good idea when any of my pack were coming over. If there were two things I knew two things about teenage werewolves, it was that:

1. they were more inclined to be open minded and less cranky when they were fed, and

2. they were always hungry.

I set a huge pot of water on the stovetop to boil, and started chopping onions. It was so much easier to do things like this now that I was on my own. I felt like I had room to breathe, away from my mother's smothering presence. As much as I loved my Mom, I knew that the whole werewolf thing freaked her out, and she was always nervous when it was talked about. It's not that I had moved out; more like she had. Two years ago she had moved in with Charlie Swan on a semi-permanent basis, which had become more permanent over the past year. She'd wanted me and Seth to love in with her, but I'd protested. Besides the fact that I didn't much fancy living with Charlie (he was a nice guy and all, but the thought of Mom being with anyone except Dad was still weird), it made it seem so much more permanent, like he was actually part of our family. I'd told her Forks was too far from the pack and my job, and that Seth was still in La Push high school and should finish there. Mom had been in and out of both houses for a while, but now she only came to visit us once a week. We were sort of independent.

So it was sort of like having my own place. Except that my kid brother lived with me, and that my house had sort of become werewolf central. My house served for my pack like Sam's did for his. Probably for the same reason – I was the only one among them who could cook anything worth eating.

I turned off the heat on the ground beef, and threw spaghetti noodles into the boiling water. The frying onions left a warm and tantalizing scent in the air.

Seth walked into the kitchen, obviously following his nose.

"Hey, that smells great."

I smiled tightly. It was nice when someone appreciated my food. Even if those someones were four giant, idiotic boys.

"Hand me that can of tomato sauce?" I asked him.

He grabbed the can opener, and opened the can before he handed it to me.

I glanced at the clock. If Jacob was going to come, he should just come, instead of taking his time. I knew that it didn't take this long to drive to the Cullens and back, so he was probably staying with Nessie for a while before coming.

"Set the table?" I asked Seth, adding the spices to the sauce. Two tablespoons of oregano, two of basil, one of salt, half a teaspoon of marjoram, half of thyme. I measured and stirred, smelling the fragrant scent of tomatoes and spices.

"Hey, that smells good," Jacob said, echoing Seth's words as he came in the door.

I wrinkled my nose at the sharp, sweet scent he brought with him. Vampire.

"Thought you might be hungry," I said.

Jake grinned at me.

"Have I told you how much I love you today, Leah?"

I rolled my eyes.

"Me, or my cooking?"

"Both," Jacob answered, plopping himself down on a kitchen chair.

"Well you'll have to wait another few minutes, the sauce needs to simmer," I said, putting the lid on the pot and turning down the heat under it.

Jacob shrugged.

"That's ok, I can wait for a while," he said. "Besides, there's something I wanted to talk to you about."

I groaned inwardly. Couldn't this conversation wait until after supper? No need to ruin a perfectly good pasta with strong emotions.

"And don't even try to get out of it," Jake continued.

I scowled at him.

He winced.

"Come on, Leah. It wasn't as if you were being subtle or anything."

I threw up my hands in despair.

"Do you want me to come out and say it, Jacob?"

He gave me a hard look.

"Fine," I grumbled. "I imprinted. Happy?"

"On Steve Uley." It wasn't a question.

"_Yes_, Jacob. On Sam's older brother."

Jake wrinkled his nose.

"That's weird."

I gave a huff of frustration.

"Don't you think I know that? I'm the one who's the most weirded out by this whole thing, ok?"

Jacob shook his head.

"You should have told me right away. You shouldn't wait for me to come to you."

I growled under my breath.

"Why? So you could look over my boyfriends for me? You're not my father, Jacob."

Jacob's eyes shot sparks.

"I know that. But I do have a right to know when something changes in my pack. For all our safety," he snapped, echoing Seth's earlier words.

My hands shook again. I clenched them on the edge of the table.

"You would have known anyways, as soon as I phased."

"But I want to know sooner than that. I think I have a right," Jacob said, his voice quieter now.

"I didn't even know myself, ok? I could hardly tell what was happening, let alone tell you." I sucked in a breath through my clenched teeth, and slowly released it. I hated being scared of losing my temper all the time. It was so annoying to always have to be in tight control of my emotions.

"I just want to make sure you're ok, Leah. Despite what you think, I do care about you," Jake said. He seemed more in control of his temper, too.

I buried my head in my hands, unable to stop the wave of emotion that crashed over me. I could feel my shoulders tremble with suppressed sobs.

"Hey Leah, you ok?" Seth asked, his hand on my arm.

"No, I'm not ok," I whispered.

Seth wrapped a comforting arm around my shoulders and held me tightly to his side.

"It's gunna be ok, Sis," he said softly.

After a moment I raised my head. I knew that I must be a mess, eyes rimmed with red and hair everywhere, but I didn't care.

"It's just all so… new," I said in a small voice. "I don't know what's going on, and I'm not used to that. I'm scared."

Jake chuckled.

"Yeah, it is a little scary at first. But it's going to be ok, really."

"I didn't think I could imprint," I said softly. "Biological dead end, remember?"

Jake made a face.

"Well it seems like you were wrong there."

"Yeah," I drew a hand over my face. That was one thing to be thankful for.

"And at least you're not in love with Sam any more," Seth said. Ok, two things to be thankful for.

"Makes sense, if you think about it," Jacob said, contemplatively.

I looked up to see him staring off into space, with an expression of deep thought on his face.

"Makes sense?" I asked. "You're sure not making any."

Jacob gave me a small half smile.

"Well all of us who had been in love before we transformed are now imprinted on relatives of the people we were in love with."

I raised my eyebrow, not quite following his logic. He could see that. He sighed, and tried to explain himself.

"I was in love with Bella before I transformed into a werewolf."

"You were in love with Bella after you transformed into a werewolf too," I said, remember the images in his mind that I had _not_ wanted to see.

Jake held his hand out.

"Let me finish, Leah. I was in love with Bella, until I saw Nessie. Then I realized that I had loved Bella because on some level she reminded me of what I _would_ love in Nessie. Subconsciously, I was in love with Nessie's qualities in Bella. Does that make any sense?"

"You loved Bella because she reminded you of Nessie? But you hadn't even met Nessie yet. Nessie wasn't even born," I said.

"I know that. But somehow part of me recognized Nessie in Bella, and that's why I was in love with her. Think about it. Of the three people who were in love before the transformation, we've all imprinted on relatives of the person we _were _in love with. Sam on your cousin, you on Sam's brother, me on Bella's daughter. Sam loved you because you reminded him of Emily. And you loved Sam because he reminded you of Steve."

I shook my head in disbelief. That would have been the stupidest idea that I had ever heard. Except that… it made sense. In some weird and twisted way, Jake's logic worked.

"But I really loved Sam," I said, not realizing till afterwards that I had used the past tense. "I didn't love him for Steve, I loved him for him."

"I'm not trying to belittle what you felt for Sam. I really loved Bella too," Jacob said, leaning back in his chair. "But I think that's how imprinting works. Subconsciously we fall for the people that remind us of the one we're supposed to be with someday."

I shook my head. This werewolf thing got weirder and weirder by the day.

A timer went off, and I got up from the table. I uncovered the pot with the sauce in it, and a delicious scent wafted out. Jacob's stomach growled loudly, breaking the tension. We all laughed.

"Hungry?" I quipped.

"You know I am. Especially for your spaghetti."

With that kind of encouragement, it was no wonder I cooked for all the boys. They were so appreciative of my (admittedly meager) talents when it came to the kitchen. It was nice to be appreciated for something.

I served Jake first, then Seth, then myself. More salt, less oil next time, I thought as I chewed. Sometimes I forgot that the recipe says a tablespoon of oil, but really I only needed half that. The two boys didn't seem to notice. They ate with a gusto that made me smile a little sarcastically. They were growing werewolves, after all. Although if Jake grew any more he would officially be classified as a giant.

I ate two plates of spaghetti. Jake had four. Seth had five. By the time they were finished eating, I was done the dishes and was putting them away.

"That was _good_," Seth commented. Jacob nodded his head in agreement.

"I knew there was a reason we keep Leah around," he joked.

"Yeah. We all know it's not my winning personality," I said, smiling slightly.

"Well, you're not as annoying as Paul, that's something," Jake shot back. We shared an amused glace. It had been a joke between us ever since I had first joined Jake's pack, when he had commented that I may have been annoying, but I wasn't as annoying as Paul, who had imprinted on Jake's sister and taken to spending every free minute at the Black house. He still did that, although now he and Rachel were engaged. Jake _loved_ that.

Jake glanced at the kitchen clock and then grimaced.

"Time to join the rest of the pack and do our rounds," he said.

Suddenly I felt cold. As soon as I phased, Quil and Embry would know about Steve. I just knew that they would never let me hear the end of it. Especially Embry. He had been harping on about how at least the majority of our pack hadn't imprinted. But now that I had, it was only him and Seth. He was going to be mad about it. And probably tease the life out of me as a result. That was one thing I was _not_ looking forward to.

Jacob must have caught the look on my face. He grimaced.

"It's not going to be that bad," he said.

"It's not your secret," I shot back. But I sighed resignedly none the less. If I was going to do this, I might as well get it over it.

_Author's Note: Yup, that's my grand idea for why I picked Sam's brother. It occurred to me the other day that of the three people that had been in love prior to their conversions, two of them imprinted on someone who was closely related to the person they had previously been in love with. So my theory was, why not Leah too? Hence Sam's brother. What do you guys think? _

_A reviewer pointed out that the books don't say that Sam had a brother. But I figure they didn't say he didn't have one either. My idea is that Steve is absent for the whole of the Twilight series, away at school, so he's not talked about. _

_The Robert Frost quotations are from "_Acquainted with the Night_" "_Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening_" and _" The Road Not Taken_". I just really love Robert Frost, and I figured that since Steve is so smart, he would know a bit of it too. Leah is Steve's 'road less travelled', I think. _


	4. As Graceful as Alice Cullen

Chapter 4

Not Everyone Can be as Graceful as Alice Cullen

With a sigh, I stepped outside onto the back porch and slipped out of my clothes. It was only mildly cold to me, even though the snow was still coming down fast. I left my clothes inside instead of fastening them to my back ankle like I usually did. It was only a routine scouting mission, I didn't intend on shifting back until I got back home.

I felt the trembles of heat running down my spine, and let them engulf me. I phased into my wolf form, shaking snowflakes off my fur.

Jake and Seth were waiting for me in the woods.

_Took you long enough_, Embry complained. He and Quil were several miles north of us. We started off at a good pace, though I could have gone much faster if I had really tried.

_What took you guys so long?_ Quil asked.

_You wouldn't believe me if I told you,_ Jake said. In his head, he ran through our previous conversation.

I gritted my teeth.

_No. Way._ Quil said, his mental voice shaking with laughter. _No freaking way!_

_Steve? Steve Uley? Sam's older brother? That's a riot! _Embry laughed. _From panting over Sam to panting over Steve? What is it with you and the Uley boys? _

_Ok, ok, _I grumbled. _That's enough with the teasing_.

_Yeah, right, Leah. You're never going to hear the end of this. Steve Uley? That's just… _

_You're not exactly one to talk, Quil_, I reminded him. _At least he wasn't a baby. _

_Shut up!_ Thought both Quil and Jake at the same time.

_I think it's great_, Seth cut in cheerfully. _People are supposed to be happy when they imprint, right? Well now Leah's going to be happy. That's what you guys want, isn't it? _

I felt a rush of affection for my baby brother.

_It's better than her being miserable all the time and the rest of us having to hear it,_ Quil agreed.

_Yeah, except that only leaves me and Seth not imprinted,_ Embry grumbled, just like I thought he would. _And Seth's just a kid_.

_Hey, watch it with the kid comments!_ Seth objected.

_Ok guys_, Jake said, calling us back to the job at hand. _We've got a parameter to run, and Sam thinks his pack can do it faster than ours. _

Jake couldn't have picked a better motivator if he had tried. Immediately I felt the hackles rise on everyone's necks. Including mine. I was up for a little competition. After all, I was the fastest one in either pack.

_We'll see about that_, Seth said, pulling his teeth back in a canine grin.

_Seth, you and Embry take the shoreline. Quil, you take the road. Leah, you go along the border line. I'm going to check the interior. _Jake instructed.

We all acknowledged our assignments, and then were off.

I let loose, and ran as fast as I could. It felt good to have the wind rushing through my fur, the ground pounding beneath my large paws. I loved being the fastest wolf in either pack. Besides the fact that I loved running, it gave me a sense of distinction to have something that I was the best at. There hadn't exactly been anything else. Until now the only thing I had been good at was pining over Sam.

Well that time seemed to be over. I used to think about Sam all the time. Now, he seemed like a accessory. He was only important in so far as he was Steve's brother. Steve, who was so smart and funny, with his strong brows and perfectly shaped lips. I wondered what it would feel like to have those lips kiss me. To have his large, soft hands tangle themselves in my short hair, to have him…

_Leah! I do _not_ want to hear this!_ Embry complained. _It's weird enough when it's a girl, but thinking about kissing a boy…! _

_Yeah, it's pretty disturbing you know,_ Jake added.

_Then stop listening,_ I snapped. _If I'm not entitled to my own daydreams…_

_Super gross_, Quil agreed.

I gave a low growl.

I tried to stop thinking about him, but it was pretty hard. I forced my mind to think about what I would wear tomorrow, what the weather would be like, when Mom's next visit would be, but thoughts of Steve kept creeping in. There was one thing I knew for sure, though: I was undoubtedly and irrevocably in love with him.

------

As the next day was Sunday, I had the day off. I worked at the tiny real estate office on the res as a secretary. They sold houses in and around La Push, as well as to the crazy extreme hunters and fishers who wanted cottages. Not exactly my idea of fun, but whatever. I was glad I didn't have to make the miserably wet and cold land look like it was a nice place to live. All I had to do was field calls and keep things organized.

I let Seth sleep in again today. I felt sorry for the poor guy: not only did he have to cope with being a werewolf, he had to do high school as well. I was glad I was out of that whole mess. You couldn't pay me to do high school again.

But Seth wasn't a very late sleeper. He padded downstairs at around nine, looking for something to eat. I wordlessly set another bowl for him, and pulled out his favorite sugar-covered cereal.

"Thanks," he muttered, his mouth full of Co-co Pops.

I crunched down on my toast, and nodded. I didn't really have a plan for today. Before yesterday I had been planning on just hanging around. Maybe seeing what my friend Chloe was up to. But now… all I wanted to do was go to Sam's house to see if Steve was there. It was a weird feeling. From avoiding everything to do with Sam to suddenly wanting to be near him, if it meant being near Steve.

There was a knock at the door.

"Can you get that?" I asked Seth.

Seth looked pointedly at me, his mouth bulging with the giant spoonful of cereal he had just taken. I rolled my eyes and got up.

I threw open the door with a quick jerk, and then froze with shock. The object of my daydreams was standing right there, smiling dazzlingly at me.

"Good morning," he said, his deep bass voice seeming to caress me.

"Good morning," I stuttered back.

"Sam and Emily and I are going ice skating today, and Sam was wondering if you and Seth wanted to go. He said there would be hockey for Seth, if he wants to play."

"Excellent!" Seth said, coming up behind me.

I glanced down at myself. I was still in my pajamas, and I knew I looked like a total mess. My hair must have been everywhere: I hadn't brushed it yet this morning.

"Um…" I said.

Steve smiled again, and my heart stopped.

"Sam knew you wouldn't be ready yet, so he sent me ahead. He says he'll be by to pick you up in a half hour, if you're coming."

"I'm ready now," Seth chirped.

"Just give me a few minutes to get dressed, ok?" I said.

Steve looked amused.

"Sure."

I hurried up the stairs, and rushed straight into the bathroom. First order of business: shower. It was one of the quickest showers I had ever had. I jumped out as soon as I was clean, and rummaged around in the drawer for my hairdryer. It was in the very back, of course. I hadn't used it since I had cut my hair.

I moved to my room, hunting through my drawers for some clothes. Jeans, socks, an olive green v-neck shirt with a white camisole underneath. I blow dried my hair one handed while I dressed. After a moment's hesitation, I dug through my makeup bag and put on some mascara and a tiny bit of eyeshadow. I smiled at myself in the mirror, running my fingers through my hair. It was soft and glossy, like it always got when I blow dried it. It felt nice to look halfway like a girl again. I checked my watch. Twenty four minutes. Very nice.

Steve was in the kitchen, watching Seth eat another bowl of cereal. I snagged my toast on the way past.

"Hey guys," I said.

Steve stared at me, his eyes wide, his mouth slightly open. I blinked, feeling self conscious. Was there something wrong with what I was wearing?

"You look pretty," Seth commented, getting up to put his bowl in the sink.

"Uh…" Steve seemed to recover himself. "Yeah, you do." His eyes met mine. "Very pretty."

I blushed, embarrassed.

"Thanks," I muttered.

The doorbell rang.

"That must be Sam," I said, relieved to get out of the awkward situation. I shuffled to the door and opened it.

Emily was there, swaddled in a giant coat.

"Hey, Leah! You coming skating with us?"

"Should you be skating in your condition?" I asked.

Emily made a face.

"Don't you start too. I'm _fine_."

"Maybe you can talk some sense into her," Sam said, from behind her.

"Like I ever could. Let me grab my coat."

Behind me, Seth and Steve were already putting on their winter clothes. I grabbed my boots and got out of the way, sitting on the stairs to tug them on. It felt like getting into battle gear. When I looked up, Steve was standing in front of me, holding out my coat.

I smiled.

"Thanks," I said, winding my scarf around my neck and shrugging into the white wool. I really should wear the other coat, so this one wouldn't get ruined. But I knew it made me look nice, and he had already said I was pretty today. It was worth risking my favorite coat if Steve could think I was pretty for a little while.

I slung my bag over my shoulder, and locked the door behind me. It was overcast today, and there was still a nip in the air.

Seth came out of the garage, his skates tied together at the laces and flung over his shoulder, his hockey stick in one hand.

"Are we going or what?" he asked.

We all piled into Sam's car. It was cramped with so many huge guys in the back with me. I sat in the middle, since I was the smallest, with Seth on my one side and Steve on my other. I shuffled closer to Seth, so that I wouldn't be crowding Steve.

"Hey, Leah, not so close," he complained. "You're squishing me!"

"Sorry," I said, making a face at him. I wiggled closer to Steve, whose shoulders looked constricted.

"Wait a minute," He said. He squirmed in his seat, managing to free his arm and drape it across the back of my seat. "That's better," he said, giving me a grin.

I felt a hot blush spread over my cheeks, and I looked down at my hands clenched in my lap. He was _not_ making this easy. I held myself rigid, so I wouldn't touch him at all. I didn't want to make this worse than it was. By the time we got to the pond, my muscles ached from holding them so still. I was glad to get out of the cramped car.

It wasn't the pond where we usually went skating, I noticed as we walked toward it.

I shot a questioning glance at Sam.

"Outside the boundary line," he grunted. "For Jake."

I nodded, understanding. The Cullens were here.

The pond was glassy smooth, and perfect for skating. Hockey nets had been set up at one end, and Seth hurried towards the game without putting his skates on.

"Hey guys, shorthanded?" he asked eagerly.

I paused at a log that someone had dragged to the ice's edge, and sat down, tugging my skates out of my bag. Steve sat down with me.

"I'm warning you," he said, taking off his boots and beginning to lace up his black hockey skates. "I was never very good at this, and I haven't done it in years."

I smiled.

"We used to go all the time with my dad," I said. "I think I could skate before I could walk."

"Oh great," Steve groaned. "I'm going to embarrass myself in front of you, aren't I?"

"It's your turn," I shot back.

Steve grinned.

I tied off my last skate with a flourish, and stood up. Immediately, my balance re-centered itself so that I was perfectly at east on the ice. Steve stood up, wobbling a little.

"Here, take my hands," I said, holding them out. He grasped them, holding tight. I laughed, and skated a little ways, pulling him with me. "See? It's not so hard."

There were a lot of boys over on the far corner playing hockey, and not just werewolves either. Some of the pack must have brought their friends. On the non- hockey portion of the ice were several people moving in circles. The wind blew, and I caught the familiar, sharp-and-sweet tingling scent of vampires. I wrinkled my nose.

Carlisle and Esme Cullen were slowly gliding around near the hockey game, arm in arm. I think Carlisle wanted to keep an eye on the boys and make sure that no one's body parts came in contact with any blades. Edward and Bella were holding hands and laughing as they elegantly skated in the middle of the ice.

"Who's _that?_" Steve asked, his mouth hanging open. I looked to where he was pointing, and then scowled. Alice was showing off. She was spinning and pirouetting like an Olympic figure skater, one leg balanced perfectly in the air. She seemed to be weaving an intricate dance in and around Jasper, who was skating slowly, his hands behind his back.

I didn't get to answer, because Nessie skated up to me. She looked like a regular snow queen. Her creamy cheeks were flushed and her curly hair was pulled up to make room for fuzzy ear muffs.

"Lee! You came!" she said, smiling radiantly.

As ever, I couldn't help but catch her smile.

"Yeah. Someone had to make sure Steve didn't fall on his butt all the time," I said, shooting a glace at Steve, who still held on to my hand for dear life.

She laughed.

"Don't know how to skate?"

Steve shook his head.

"I must have known at one time. But years of books have made me forget."

"It's easy," Nessie said, skating backwards in front of us.

"Show off," said Jacob, coming up behind her.

"Jake's just jealous I can skate faster than he can," Nessie taunted.

"Cannot," Jake contradicted.

"Can too," Nessie retorted, taking off like a shot. Jacob followed, laughing.

There was a bell-like laugh from behind us, and the smell got stronger.

"He shouldn't encourage her," Bella said.

I turned, pulling Steve with me. He wobbled.

"Don't take your feet off the ice, just glide along it," Edward advised him.

Steve gave the vampire a weak smile.

"This is harder than I remember it being," he said.

"I don't believe we've met," Edward said smoothly. "I'm Edward Cullen, and this is my wife Bella." He held out his hand. I had to give it to Edward, as much as I didn't like him: he was a perfect gentleman.

I knew by the expression on Steve's face that he hadn't been expecting Edward's skin to be so cold. Touching vampires was something you had to get used to.

"Nice to meet you," he said. "I'm Steve Uley. I'm here visiting my brother Sam for Christmas."

_My_ Steve, I said in my thoughts, knowing that Edward could hear them.

Edward looked from my face to my hand in Steve's, and then back.

"I see," he said.

It could have sounded like he was responding to Steve's comment, but I knew he was acknowledging the link between Steve and me.

Bella smiled brightly at me. She was always trying to be friends with me. Even after three years, I knew that it was never going to work. Not after what she had done to Jacob. She had torn him apart, and I had had to hear all about it in Jake's head. Plus, she was a bloodsucker now. No, we could never be friends. But we could be friendly, for Nessie's sake. It wasn't hard to love Nessie, even if I wasn't in Jake's head all the time.

I looked around, noticing that we were two bloodsuckers short.

"Where are Emmett and Rosalie?" I asked. I almost called them _Hercules_ and _Blondie_, like Jake did. But I didn't think that Edward would appreciate me making fun of his siblings to his face.

"They're hunting," Edward said, unconcerned.

"You guys hunt a lot around here?" Steve asked.

"It's one of the reasons we moved to Forks," Edward said, smoothly.

_Hunting_, if that's what they called sucking the blood of animals.

"How long are you staying in La Push, Steve?" Bella asked.

"Well, if I live through this, until after New Years," Steve said.

I laughed.

"You're not going to die, you're doing fine," I encouraged.

Bella glided an elegant circle around us.

"It'll come back to you," she said. She held out her hand, and Edward took it. They skated away together.

"So Leah's finally imprinted," Edward said to her quietly, too low for Steve to hear.

Bella glanced back at us.

"Is _that_ what that was? I've never seen Leah act so nice to anyone in my entire life…" They skated out of hearing range for their low whispers.

"Here," I said to Steve. "Hold my hands, and I'll teach you how to skate properly."

I turned around so that I was facing him, and slowly skated backwards holding his hands between us.

"Do like Edward said. Don't take your feet up off the ice. Glide."

He moved a few steps, then a few steps more, getting better with each step. His lips moved into a huge, sunny smile. I felt my world suddenly light up, and a warmth flutter down to rest in the pit of my stomach.

"I think I'm getting it!" he said.

"You better let go, before…" Alice said, gliding gracefully past us and spinning in place.

"What is she… oh!" Steve slipped, and fell. I wasn't strong enough to support his weight as well as my own on my skates, and fell on top of him in a tangle of arms and legs.

"Leah! Are you ok? I'm so sorry!"

But I couldn't answer. I was laughing too hard. Steve chuckled too.

"That was spectacular," I teased.

Steve laughed harder, and I could feel the vibrations in his chest. Suddenly, I was acutely aware of just how close his face was to mine, of how I was practically lying on top of him.

I scrambled off, getting to my feet.

"You ok?" I asked, offering him my hand. He took it, but instead of hauling himself up, he pulled me back down beside him.

"Hey! No fair!" I complained.

He laughed.

"If I'm down, you should be too."

He got up, and helped me up as well.

"Well that was fun," I said, grinning.

"Speak for yourself," Steve replied, rubbing his backside.

I just laughed again.

"You up for some hot chocolate?" Sam asked, skating up to us.

"If I can make it that far," Steve said, looking rather dismally at how far we had gotten from the log where we had tied our skates, where Emily was now sitting with a thermos and cups. He held out his hand.

"Help me?" he said.

He didn't have to ask. I took his hand again with a smile.

_Author's Note: I couldn't help adding in some of the Cullens :-) It's fun to write them from an outside viewpoint. Leah's not too impressed with Edward and Bella, but I don't think she can help liking Nessie. Or rather, Nessie just latches on to her and makes Leah like her. _

_Leah is not my usual voice, I have to admit, but I'm having fun writing her. It's been a challenge to write in her slightly carefree, lightly more earthy voice. It's been a stretch of my writing capacity, but I've enjoyed it. I've been inspired the last couple of days – I'm not usually this productive. _


	5. When Someone is Holding Your Hand

Chapter 5

Christmas is so Much Better When Someone is Holding Your Hand

We had only known each other for two weeks, but it felt like I had known Steve for years. We were so comfortable around each other already. Maybe Jacob had been right – maybe my whole life up until this point had been leading up to Steve. Maybe until now I had just been waiting for him.

It was weird, but somehow that made sense. Somehow we were a perfect match. I wondered if he felt it too. He must have felt something, because we spent nearly every day together. Christmas shopping for my mom; making cookies; decorating our tree, which Seth had found in wolf form and refused to leave till I ran back and got a hatchet to cut it down. And it was actually _fun._ I used to hate all the dumb cutesy Christmas stuff. It was just an annoying waste of time. But now, everything seemed like it was actually worth doing.

We had just finished making popcorn strings for the tree. I'd had to make a lot of popcorn, because Seth and Steve kept eating it all. But it was fun anyways. Seth was now fast asleep on the floor, having picked up the wonderful ability to fall asleep anywhere from Jake. His mouth was hanging open and he looked sort of sweet and innocent like that. I resisted the urge to draw a mustache on his resting face. He would _not_ have found that amusing. Steve was stretched out on the sofa, propping himself up on one arm to better read his book. His brow was furrowed in concentration, and his free hand moved to turn pages and push his glasses back up his nose alternately.

A sudden urge overtook me, and I hurried up to my room. It was its usual chaotic mess. I made a face, and began hunting through the stacks of things till I found my sketchbook and a pencil. I used to sketch all the time, but lately the desire to draw hadn't exactly been that strong.

I settled down in the armchair opposite Steve on the couch, and began flipping through my book. They were mostly portraits of people or sketches of scenery that caught my attention. One was of a single leaf, with as much detail as I could fit into it – quite a challenge, considering my acute werewolf-honed eyesight. Several were of my pack doing various things. One was of Jake, polishing his precious motorcycle. I smiled at that one. I know he fixed it up and everything, but that bike was a piece of _junk_.

One of my favorites was a sketch of the beach I had done, and later finished with pencil crayons. It was of the beach at sunset, with the cliff looming off to one side. A lone figure stood, his back to the picture, staring out to sea. I had drawn that one in a fit of melancholy, not really thinking about the figure with his back to me.

I turned to a blank page, and smiled. I knew exactly what I was going to draw. With practiced strokes, I began outlining a figure, lying on his side. As I worked, Steve's features became more obvious. With each line of my pencil he became more pronounced. I copied down the tension in his shoulder, the frown of concentration, the spark of interest in his brown eyes.

I was so focused on my work that I didn't hear Steve until he was right beside me.

"You're good," he said softly.

I jumped.

"You scared me," I said, pressing a hand against my speeding heart.

"Sorry," he smiled at me, and my heart started pounding for a different reason. He glanced down at the sheet. "Is that me?" he asked.

I blushed.

"Yeah. Not any good, I know, but…"

"No, it's really good. I mean, I've never seen myself reading, but I bet that's what I look like. I didn't know you could draw."

"Well I haven't for a while," I said, self-consciously.

"May I?" he asked, taking the sketchbook from my hands. I let him have it. Truth be told, there wasn't much I wouldn't give him, if he asked for it.

He settled back down on the sofa, and flipped through the sketchbook, lingering on certain drawings. I came to sit beside him.

He studied the sketches without a word, then handed the book back to me.

"Those are really good. You've got talent, Leah," he said.

"I just play at it," I replied.

He shook his head.

"No, they're really good. I'm really impressed."

I flushed, and looked down.

"I'm glad you like them," I said.

"Except for this last one," he said, flipping to the final sketch of him reading. "I don't think I'm that concentrated. Or that handsome."

"You're more handsome than that," I muttered.

He looked down at me, his face only inches from mine, and there was an inexplicable sadness in his face. I didn't know what caused that sadness, but I wanted to erase it. I wanted whatever was making him sad to go away and never come back.

"This is a mistake," he said softly, looking into my eyes.

I felt a stab of hurt immediately.

"Mistake?" I said, trembling

"Oh yes," he said. His face was now closer, his lips hovering over mine by mere inches. We were breathing the same air. It was hard to focus on what he was saying when he was so close, but I forced myself to pay attention.

"Oh yes," he repeated. "A very serious mistake. I shouldn't be doing this."

The flash of sadness was gone from his features, and in their place I could see desire, longing, and a hint of a smile. And then the space between our lips was gone. His soft lips were on mine, molding to mine. He tasted like cinnamon and popcorn and something woodsy that I had come to associate with him alone. I drew closer, tangling my fingers in his hair. One of his hands went around my waist, the other cradled the back of my head. Kissing Steve was one of the most amazing sensations in all the world. It left all the kisses I had ever had behind in the dust. For one idyllic moment everything in the world had come together to fit in a perfect order.

He shifted away, but too soon.

"Wow," I breathed.

Steve moved farther, and without his body so close to mine I felt cold.

"I shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry Leah," he said, standing up.

I shook my head, standing and catching his hand.

"I'm not. I've been thinking about kissing you since the first moment we met," I admitted. I took a step closer to him, so that I was practically standing on his big feet.

"I shouldn't be doing this," Steve said, but he was looking at me that way again. I stood on my toes, and he bent down. Our lips brushed in the most gentle and feather-like of touches.

Seth jerked awake, and looked around sleepily.

"What'd I miss?" he asked blearily.

Steve and I jerked away from each other, so that we weren't touching at all. I mourned the contact, and cursed Seth for waking up at just the wrong moment.

"Nothing, Seth. I was just going home," Steve said. He started walking towards the door, and I trailed after him.

"Goodnight," I said, as he tugged on his coat.

Steve paused in the doorway, and reached down to brush his fingers over my cheek.

"Goodnight, Leah," he said, his voice low and solemn.

And then he disappeared into the night.

------

The next day was Christmas Eve, and Mom was coming over. I couldn't very well run over to Sam's house on a day meant for family, but I was half wild to see Steve again. Our kiss the night before had only left me wanting more, and I couldn't bear to be away from him for so long. The only thing that kept me going was the knowledge that I would see him in church that night.

Everyone in La Push went to church on Christmas Eve. It didn't matter if you were Christian, or atheist, or even if you were a werewolf, on Christmas Eve you were there in the pew of the tiny Free Methodist church. And you were dressed to the nines.

I had always thought it was a dumb tradition, and hated going as a kid. I mean, with Santa just around the corner, what kid wanted to sit still and listen for two hours? Even the carol singing was boring, because the carols were always the same.

Then when I had gotten older it had just become One of Those Things You Did Because Everyone Else Did. And because you had always done it. Plus we usually bought new outfits for it, and that was always fun. This year Mom and Charlie were coming over and spending the whole day here for Christmas Eve, then we were spending Christmas Day at Charlie's house, so Bella, Edward, and Nessie could come over. I resented that they were part of my family now, in a way, but Bella was still Charlie's kid, and Charlie was dating my mom, so… I grimaced at the logic.

I knew that the Uleys would be there tonight. Of course. Everyone was going to be there tonight. All day my stomach churned with anticipation. I had stayed up nearly all night sketching and perfecting the drawing that I was going to give Steve for Christmas. I had drawn it from memory, and it actually wasn't bad, if I do say so myself. It was of him and I skating, holding hands as we glided over the ice. It was one of my best memories of him, so I wanted him to have something that would remind him of it. I had just torn a page out of my sketchbook, so it was nothing fancy or anything, but I hoped he would like it.

I brushed my hair again, making sure that every gleaming strand was in place, and smoothed down my dress. Mom and I had bought it in September, when there was a sale in Seattle. We didn't have the money to buy it full price, and usually I didn't get a super nice one, because none of the nice ones were on sale, but this year I had been lucky. It was a simple black, with thick straps, and a tapered waist that made me look like I had a figure. It flared out and fell just below my knees in a graceful sweep. I slipped my feet into the black pumps, and surveyed myself in the mirror. All in all, pretty nice. I was wearing makeup again, and even some lipstick. I half-pulled my hair back, and secured it with a gold clip.

"Ready to go?" Mom asked, at my door.

"Yeah," I said, shooting a final look at the mirror.

Mom came in. She was wearing a long dark purple skirt with a black turtle neck.

"Oh honey, you look beautiful," she said to me, smiling. Her arms opened, and I slipped into them for a hug. "I'm so proud of you," she whispered.

I pulled away.

"For what?" I asked.

"For becoming such a lovely woman," Mom said.

I blushed.

"Come on, Mom, we're going to be late."

Charlie and Seth were downstairs, Charlie looking distinctly uncomfortable in a suit. Seth was wearing dark pants and an untucked white dress shirt.

"Ready?" Charlie asked, tugging at his tie.

Mom pulled his hands away.

"Stop playing with it, or it'll come undone," she said.

"Too tight anyways," Charlie muttered.

Mom leaned up and kissed him. I looked away. Ewww, gross. I did _not_ want to think about my mom kissing anybody. It was too weird.

"Don't touch it, you look fine," Mom repeated.

Seth and I exchanged sickened glances.

"Right everybody, in the car," Mom said, suddenly sergeant major again. "We don't want to be late, or we won't find a seat."

I slipped on the red sweater I had for over my dress, and then my coat. We all went outside, and into Mom's suburban. There was no way we were going to take Charlie's police cruiser.

There was still a half hour till the service, but the parking lot was already filling up. Mom managed to slide into a spot on the road, and we walked into the church. I had only ever been in it at Christmases and Easters, and the very smell of the place reminded me of boredom. It was a nice church, I guess. Wood interior, large windows, long rows of slightly uncomfortable benches. Tonight it was full of people and light. Candles stood on the alter in the front, and they were handing them out at the door. I took one as we walked past.

We found an empty row, and slid in. Charlie looked even more uncomfortable in church than he did in a suit, but Mom held his hand firmly with a look of determination that I recognized. Charlie opted to sit at the very end, next to the end aisle. Mom sat beside him, Seth beside her, and me with the rest of the row beside me. I fidgeted with my candle while Mom chatted happily with people around her and Seth started folding his programme.

"Is this seat taken?" asked a familiar voice.

My head flew up and my heart jumped into my throat.

"No," I managed to squeak out. "Not taken."

"Good," Steve said. He slid in beside me, helping Emily sit down.

"Leah! Nice to see you again," Emily said, one hand resting possessively on her bump.

I smiled at her. It was getting easier and easier to be natural around Emily again.

"Hey Emily. Where's Sam?" I asked.

Emily shrugged.

"Getting our programs and candles. He didn't think I could stand that long." She rolled her eyes, and I shared an amused look with her. Sam was obviously being overprotective again.

"Got em," Sam said, coming to sit beside Emily. He handed her a candle, and leaned over to whisper something in her ear. It was such a personal moment that I turned away.

"I was wondering if I'd see you here," I said to Steve.

Steve smiled. He was stunningly handsome in a dark blue suit jacket and crisp white shirt, with semi-casual black slacks. I felt my heart miss a beat.

"I remember going to these things as a kid. It's a Christmas tradition."

I nodded, knowing how he felt. He was sitting right beside me, our shoulders touching, and suddenly I felt a little too warm. I slipped off my sweater.

"Red," he said softly.

I looked up at him, confused.

"What?"

"You were wearing red the first time we met," he said.

"Oh." I didn't think he had noticed.

"You look really nice by the way," he said.

I blushed again.

"Thanks. So do you."

There was an awkward silence between us. I floundered for something to break it.

"Oh! I have something for you," I said, remembering my picture with a flash of inspiration.

"You do?" he said, surprised.

"Yeah," I fished a folder out of my bag, and slid the picture out of it. "Merry Christmas," I said.

He looked at the picture, and then gave one of his heart-stopping smiles.

"It's us," he said.

"Yeah. The time we were skating."

"As I remember, I wasn't nearly so graceful," he laughed.

I grinned.

"I remember it differently," I replied.

He touched the paper gently, almost reverently.

"You're really very good at this, Leah. You should see about art school or something."

I looked down, embarrassed. He kept giving me complements, and I didn't know what to do with them.

"I'm glad you gave me this," he said. "Because I have something for you."

"You do?" I asked, my head shooting up.

He put a small, neatly wrapped package into my hand. It even had a bow on it.

"You didn't have to…" But before I could finish, the minister at the front of the church started talking.

All through the service, the carols, the Christmas story about the baby Jesus and the shepherds and the wise men, all I could think about was the small box in my hands.

"Put it down, you'll get to open it soon," Steve whispered, his breath tickling my ear. He took the present out of my grasp, and replaced the small box with his large, warm hand.

I stared at our interlocking hands for a moment, and then at the box, which he had set at our feet. Then, I smiled and looked forward.

It was the fastest Christmas Eve service I had ever sat through. Usually it took forever for the pastor to stop talking, and for the two kids to toddle forward with the baby doll to the front. This time, before I knew it Mary and Joseph were holding Baby Jesus at the wooden manger at the front of the church, and the lights were dimming. The pastor took a lit candle from the front, and lit the candle of a man in the front row, and we started singing Silent Night. The words were up on the power point, but everyone knew then anyways.

We got to half way through the second verse before Seth leaned his candle against mine and lit it. We were sitting pretty far back. My candle lit, and I leaned over to light Steve's. He held his candle in his left hand, leaving his right hand entwined with my left. He passed the light on to Emily, and we kept singing. He had a deep, rich bass voice that never wavered off tune like I knew mine did from time to time. It was soothing to listen to, and I wished that the song would go on forever.

"Jesus, Lord at thy birth, Jesus, Lord at thy birth," we all finished. All the candles were lit, and the dark sanctuary was alive with three hundred points of light.

The pastor beamed at us from the front of the church, his round face illuminated by the flickering light.

"Merry Christmas, and God bless you. Go in peace," he finished, just like he did every year.

Someone started playing piano in the background, and the buzz of talk grew. I blew out my candle.

"Better blow out mine too. Wouldn't want to _accidentally_ catch your hair on fire or anything," Seth teased.

I, childishly, stuck my tongue out at him. Little brothers were such a pain.

"You can have this back now," Steve said, putting the small box back in my hands.

"Can I open in?" I asked.

He shook his head.

"Not till you get home."

I made a face at him.

"Not going to make me wait till tomorrow morning?" I teased.

"I'm not that cruel," he replied.

"Steve, I think we're going," Emily said, touching his arm lightly.

Steve looked a little disappointed.

"Ok, Emily. I'll be right there," he said.

"Merry Christmas, Steve" I said.

"Merry Christmas, Leah," he replied.

_Author's Note: Yeah, I couldn't help myself. More fluff. What can I say? I have no excuse. I wasn't going to let Steve and Leah kiss, and then someone said they should have when they were skating, and it made me think. _

_I hope no one is offended by the scene in the church. I just figured it's sort of something everyone does at Christmas, isn't it? I tried to keep the scene as neutral as possible, for being in a religious institution. After all, Christmas is a Christian holiday, no matter how secular it gets. _


	6. Keep your Opinions to Yourself

Chapter 6

I'd Thank You to Keep Your Opinions to Yourself

I forced myself to wait to open Steve's present until we were at Charlie's house and I was by myself. Mom insisted we gather around the tree after church and take pictures as we each opened one present. I wanted to scream with impatience.

I tried to smile and seem excited when I opened the new watch from Charlie.

"Thanks, Charlie, it's great," I said, slipping it onto my wrist.

"I thought you'd need it, since your old one broke," Charlie said, looking embarrassed.

I smiled. I didn't tell Charlie that my other watch had broken because I had phased with it still on. He wouldn't have wanted to hear that. He was on a strictly voluntary need-to-know basis with all things werewolf and vampire.

Finally – _finally _– I had managed to make my excuses and slip up to the spare room. It had once been Bella's, before she had gotten married, which was kinda strange. I tried not to think about it.

I closed the door, and locked it. Then I all but pounced on the small, wrapped box. I sat on the bed and tore the wrapping paper, letting it fall to the floor. Inside was a black, rectangular box, with a lid, like the kind you get in jewelry stores. Irrationally, my heart started to speed up. With shaking hands, I took off the lid, and then gasped. Inside was a oval locket, gleaming dully in the dim light.

I stared at it in disbelief. This was _nice_. All I had given him was a crummy picture, and he had got me a locket? I picked it up out of the box by the gold chain, and watched the locket dangle, twisting around and catching the light.

"Wow," I murmured.

It was beautiful. It was perfect. Usually I wasn't one for jewelry, but I loved this necklace instantly.

I put it around my neck and fastened the catch, then turned to admire myself in the mirror. The girl I saw there wasn't someone I recognized. She was radiant; she was smiling; she was _happy_. I hadn't been that way for so long, I had almost forgotten what it was like. I raised a hand and gently stroked the smooth gold of the locket wonderingly.

-------

I knew that I had to tell Steve about my… wolfish condition… soon. I hated keeping secrets from him, even a secret as vital as what I was. It was actually painful not to tell him that I was a werewolf, but part of me was scared. After all, I was about to show him that I was a mythical creature. I didn't know how he would take that. Would he want me, after I had shown him that my other form was a giant grey wolf? If he was like any normal person, he would run away screaming, and I would never see him again. Part of me didn't want to risk that. I didn't think I could handle being away from him, even for a few days. Being away from him forever would kill me. But I knew that I had to tell him.

I deliberated long and hard on how I was going to tell Steve I was a werewolf.

_Just go up to him and transform_, Quil suggested.

I snorted.

_Yeah right. He'd just run away_, I scoffed.

_No he won't. He'll probably think it's really cool_, Embry said. I could hear the grin in his voice.

_Not everyone is you, Embry_, I reminded him.

_Leah's right, guys_, Jake said, cutting through our chatter. _This is serious, and it effects all of us. Besides, we're going to need the practice for when Claire is old enough to know what we are._

Quil winced. I knew he wasn't looking forward to the day he had to reveal to his imprint that he was a werewolf. And I knew how he felt.

_We should all be there to help her_, Seth said.

I shook my shaggy head.

_No. I want to do this by myself._

_But what if it goes south?_ Embry asked.

_You think I'm going to _hurt_ him? _I snapped.

_You never know what could happen_, Embry argued back. _There's no harm in being careful_.

I considered this for a moment. I didn't really want my pack near when I told Steve, but Embry had a point. They should be close enough to hear me if I called for help. Which wasn't exactly a task. The farthest we'd been able to hear members of our pack was 200 miles, and I wasn't expecting any of them to be that far away.

_Leah, would it be ok if we hang around in wolf form, so you can call us if you need us?_ Jake asked, picking up the tenor of my thoughts. _We won't be near enough to hear if you talk in human form, but if you need help… _

I hesitated for a moment. I didn't want to admit that there might be a possibility that something would go wrong and I would need their help.

_No harm in being careful_, Seth reminded me.

I sighed.

_Fine. But don't listen in!_

_Not like we can help it if you're in wolf form,_ Quil reminded me.

_I know that. Just remember that I'll be your turn soon, Quil Ateara. _

Quil winced again, not only at the use of his full name, but at the reminder that we were going to have to go through this pageant again when he had to tell Claire.

_Don't worry, Lea, _Seth said encouragingly. _There's nothing to worry about. Steve isn't going to care_.

_Sure,_ I said sarcastically. '_Hey Steve, I turn into a giant wolf when I'm mad, and I'm sworn to protect the tribe against bad bloodsuckers. Oh, and by the way, you're my destiny' Does that sound about right?_

Jacob rolled his eyes.

_He can handle it. _

_And if he can't?_ I couldn't help my insecurity from leaking into my thoughts _If he just leaves? What am I supposed to do then? _

_He'll be freaked out at first, but then he'll get used to it. It's not like you're a monster or anything. _

I winced at Embry's choice of words.

_Yeah_, Seth cut in, _you're a pretty girl, and he obviously likes you. _

_And it's not like he doesn't have the werewolf gene himself, _Embry said. _So really, you two aren't that different. _

_Wait, how come he isn't turning huge and furry? _Quil asked.

_I have a theory about that,_ I said.

They all looked at me expectantly.

_Well we know he has the gene, because it was passed down from Levi Uley, and Sam is a wolf too. But he wasn't here at the time the Bloodsuckers showed up, was he? So the gene wasn't activated and he never changed. _

_But there are vampires here now, _Seth said, confused. _Why isn't he changing now? _

_They're not harmful, are they? _I reminded him. _We're supposed to shift to protect the tribe, and since the tribe doesn't need protecting, we don't need any more werewolves running around. _

_Besides, _Jacob added. _I figure there's an age limit. _

_Age limit_? I asked. I had only considered one possibility

_Yeah. It only happens to guys – er – people who are younger. I mean, my dad has the gene, and so did Seth and Leah's dad, and Old Quil, but they didn't turn when the bloodsuckers showed up. It was only younger, stronger people that it happened to, the better to protect the tribe I guess. _

_What about Sam?_ I asked. _And me? We're older than the rest of you. _

_Maybe you just slipped under the wire. Sam was twenty one when this all started. And you were twenty, _Jake said.

_But Steve's only four years older than Sam, _Embry jumped in, his furry forehead creased with thought.

_Yeah, but Steve wasn't here. He comes back and he's already over the limit. This is the first time he's met the Cullens, _I said, piecing the puzzle together.

Jake nodded.

_So he does have the gene, it's just dormant because he's too old. _

_This does _not_ bode well for your kids, Leah_, Embry teased.

I made a face.

_It goes through the father, not the mother, remember? _I said, thinking of Embry.

Embry winced. He didn't like to be reminded of that fact that since his mom was Makah, not Quileute, his biological father was either a Uley, an Ateara, or a Black, all of whom were married a the time. We usually tried not to think about the implications of Embry transforming.

_Not exactly thinking about kids yet, am I? _I asked, trying to banish the thoughts of Embry's parentage out of my mind_ I'm still thinking that if he has any sense he's going to run away from this as fast as he can. _

_Have faith in yourself,_ Jake said. _It won't be as bad as that. _

_He's not going to want me once he knows what I am,_ I said, feeling the hopelessness creep into my thoughts.

_Then why are you telling him? _Embry asked impatiently.

I blinked at him. I thought it would be obvious.

_Quil and Jake know why, _I said. _I can't keep this from him. It hurts to keep secrets. _

Jacob nodded with chagrin.

_She's right. She can't _not_ tell him what she is. _

_It's a part of you. If he loves you, he'll accept that along with everything else_, Seth said, sounding sure.

I wasn't often grateful for my optimistic little brother. But today I needed his optimism.

_He's going to think I'm a monster, a freak_, I said.

_He'll get used to it. We all do. _Quil reminded me. _Besides, his own brother's one too, so it's not like he can reject werewolves altogether. _

I was scared, and I knew that they felt it too. Seth pushed his large nose against the fur of my neck in a comforting gesture.

_When are you going to do it? _Jake asked.

_Tomorrow afternoon_, I said. _Are you guys ok for then? _

My pack assented. Now all I had to was tell Steve. If you could call that _all_.

-------

I didn't get to see Steve again until three days after that conversation with my pack. I was in a state of nervous flutters when he finally did come over. I invited him over for lunch, and he was happy to come.

"I had to get away from Sam and Emily," he joked. "Too much domestic bliss is bad for _anyone_."

I smiled sympathetically. I knew how Sam and Emily could be. I thanked whatever deities were watching over me that I didn't have any feelings for Sam any more.

"Yeah, they're like that, aren't they?"

"I couldn't stand too much more of it," Steve agreed.

Seth was out for the day, so I had the whole house to myself.

"You need any help with cooking?" he asked.

I set him to work making a salad while I cooked the chicken.

"Make sure the vegetables don't boil over, please?" I asked, as I set the table.

Steve sat down at one of the kitchen chairs, stretching his long legs out in front of him. He glanced at me, and smiled.

"You're wearing the locket," he said.

I nodded, trying to hide my blush.

"It's really pretty. Thank you so much, but you really shouldn't have."

"I saw it in a store in Forks the other day, and thought about you," Steve admitted. "It's pretty but understated, like you."

"I feel bad," I admitted. "I only gave you a dumb picture."

"Hey! Don't knock my picture," Steve said with a smile.

I rolled my eyes.

"Be serious for a second. I mean, I didn't spend any money on your gift, and this is obviously an expensive present…"

Steve raised his hand to silence me.

"I bet sometime another girl is going to own a locket like that one. Some girl probably does. But no one will ever have a picture like you drew me. My gift was generic. Yours is totally unique. I'm the one who undervalued the gift giving."

I smiled at him. Did he know how totally amazing on every level he was?

"We'll just call it even, then," I said, touching the locket that hung around my neck.

"Deal," Steve agreed, grinning.

A timer dinged, and I went to check on the chicken, making sure they were totally cooked. Just because I was a wolf didn't mean I had to eat things raw. In fact, I found it slightly repulsive.

When I came back into the kitchen, Steve had already set the table. I served, and we both sat down.

I was hungry, and the food was good.

Steve chewed contemplatively.

"Penny for your thoughts?" I offered.

"Never thought I would enjoy being back in La Push," he admitted. "Usually I can't wait to leave. It's not so bad since my dad died, though."

I nodded. Joshua Uley had been a notorious drunk, and a pretty terrible father. He had died when I was a junior in high school. Sam and I had just started dating, and I was surprised that he hadn't been sad when his father had passed. Only resigned. He had been eighteen at the time, so hadn't had to go into foster care or anything.

"He was…" I struggled for the right word to describe Old Mr. Uley. Mean? Vindictive? A violent drunk who didn't know what he had in his two boys?

"He was a drunk," Steve said matter-of-factly. "And when he was drunk he was violent. And he was drunk most of the time. He drove my mother to an early grave, and was abusive towards Sam and me. I protected Sam as much as I could. It nearly killed me to leave him with Dad when I went to school."

I blinked at his frank speech.

"I guess you were glad to leave La Push."

Steve snorted.

"That's an understatement. When I got that scholarship I jumped at the chance to leave this place. My only regret was leaving Sam. But he could hold his own by then."

"Sam got a scholarship too, after high school," I said.

Steve nodded.

"I know. I never understood why he turned it down to stay here. He should have gotten out too"

I knew why. It was to stay and protect the tribe after his transformation into a werewolf.

"Guess he wanted to stay close to his roots. It's not like we're a very big tribe or anything."

"Yeah, but we've got a big history, right? Or at least it is if you hear Billy Black or Old Quil tell it."

"I like those legends," I said, thinking of the ones about the spirit walkers and shape shifters. "They're our heritage, and it's not like anybody else's. It makes us unique."

Steve sighed.

"Yeah. A minority in our own country, right? Did you know I had trouble getting a job in the private school sector because I'm an Indian?"

I looked up sharply.

"Really? I thought all that prejudge was gone."

"Apparently not. And I've had to really struggle to get where I am. Sometimes I hate what I am."

I thought about being a wolf. I thought about telling him that although I loved being what I was, it was hard to be different. But somehow I felt like now wasn't the right time. Not yet.

I reached out and took his hand.

"You're an amazing person, Steve. And the fact that you're a Quileute is just extra."

He grinned at me, and my heart skipped a beat.

"Not like I missed much while I was gone, though," he said. "La Push is always the same. Never changes, does it?"

"You might be surprised," I muttered.

His brows pulled together.

"Oh?"

I smiled slightly.

"You finished?"

Steve looked down at his empty plate.

"Yeah. It was great."

I couldn't delay it any further. If I did, I knew that I would never tell him. My heart started to beat faster, and my pulse to race. I was suddenly really nervous. I tried not to let it show.

"Hey Steve, do you want to take a take a walk?" I asked.

_Author's Note: In this chapter, I've tried to incorporate a conversation I had with one of my reviewers. They were wondering how Steve could have turned out so normal when his father Joshua Uley was a drunken and abusive father. The answer is that Steve is smart, and he worked really hard and got a prestigious scholarship so that he could go to a good school. He worked hard so that he wouldn't have to be like his father. _

_I like writing the pack. They're fun. Obviously Jake is the leader, but still sort of one of them, full of advice and good ideas; Embry is the silly one, always teasing Leah; Quil is more serious and thinks about things a lot; and of course Seth is the eternal optimist, always looking on the bright side of things. It's nice to have a good number of characters without them getting overwhelming like they would if there were the same number of wolves as in Sam's pack. _

_Next chapter: Leah's going to tell Steve what she is, and hopefully he won't take it badly. _


	7. That Didn't Go as Well

Chapter 7

Well That Didn't Go as Well as I Had Hoped

_I couldn't delay it any further. If I did, I knew that I would never tell him. My heart started to beat faster, and my pulse to race. I was suddenly really nervous. I tried not to let it show. _

_"Hey Steve, do you want to take a take a walk?" I asked_.

Steve looked skeptically outside at the heavy falling snow.

"A walk?" he asked.

I worked up my best smile.

"Sure. I've been inside all day and I really need to get out."

"Where would we go?" He asked. "It's not exactly hiking weather."

"Come on," I encouraged. "I know some trails that can only be appreciated when they're covered in snow."

Steve looked at me curiously, but nodded.

"Ok, if that's what you want to do."

I knew exactly where we were going to go. I had been thinking about it ever since I had decided with my pack that this was the right thing to do. I needed somewhere far away from civilization, but somewhere where if he ran, he wouldn't get into trouble. I remembered from Jacob's thoughts a side road where he had once taken Bella to practice riding motorcycles. He had suggested it, and I had agreed.

I tugged at Steve's arm.

"This way," I said, leaning him towards my car.

He stared at me, confused.

"I thought you said a walk. This is your car."

"We have to drive to where I want to go. Please, Steve?"

He blinked.

"Ok, sure," he said. But I knew he was getting suspicious.

I had seen how to get to the side roads from Jacob's memory, but I still drove carefully. These side roads were slippery at best, and not plowed. It was a good thing my car had four wheel drive for just such occasions as this. I focused all my concentration on driving, and tried not to think of the conversation ahead.

"Where are we going?" Steve asked.

I was getting more and more nervous. I could tell that Steve was beginning to feel my agitation as well. I tried to calm down, for his sake.

"You'll see," I said.

"Why do I feel like you're kidnapping me?" Steve asked, with a small smile. He seemed worried when I didn't joke back.

I parked the car, and then started walking in the calf-deep snow further down the road. Steve trailed after me.

"Leah? Leah, what's going on?" he called.

I kept walking. We needed to be further into the trees, and I knew there was a clearing around here somewhere.

"Leah, if you don't tell me what's going on I'm not going a step further." There was a hard edge in Steve's voice that I had never heard before.

"Just a little further," I promised desperately. I not only did I want to delay this conversation as long as possible, I wanted to be in that clearing. It became a grip on reality: if only I could get to that clearing and explain, everything was going to be ok. "Please, Steve? Trust me."

He gave me a long look, then nodded.

It only took a few minutes to reach the clearing. We trudged them in silence. When I reached the edge of the clearing, I turned to face him.

"Ok, what is it?" he asked. "Why have you been acting so strange? I've never seen you like this before."

I was shaking, and this time it had nothing to do with anger. I took a deep, calming breath.

"I brought us out here so we could be totally alone. There's something I want to tell you."

Steve blinked.

"You're a lesbian, aren't you?" he asked.

I gave a startled bark of laughter.

"No! Nothing like that," I assured him.

"Then what? What is it you have to tell me?" Steve said, looking wary again. "What's so important that we had to go out in the middle of nowhere?"

"Well not so much tell you as… show you," I continued. I knew that if I didn't get this all out right away, I would never be able to stumble my way through it. "You have to promise not to freak out though, ok? Remember that I'm still me, no matter what happens."

"What's going to happen?" Steve asked. He looked scared.

"It's easier if I just show you," I admitted. I reached behind my head and undid the clasp of his locket. Then, I handed the delicate necklace back to him.

"I don't understand," he said, looking from the locket in his hand to my face.

I smiled tightly.

"I don't want to break it," I explained. Then, I took off my coat, and let it fall to the ground. I reached for my shirt and tugged it over my head.

"What are you doing?" Steve gasped. "You're going to freeze!"

"I don't think that's my problem," I muttered. I started unbuttoning my jeans.

"Leah, please," Steve said softly.

I paused, and realized what he thought I must be doing. I smiled a tiny bit.

"This is not what you think it is. Just trust me," I repeated, stepping out of my jeans. In a minute he was going to forget that I didn't have any clothes on. He was going to be so repulsed by me that it didn't matter if I stood naked before him only a few moments ago.

With a quick flick of my wrist, I stepped out of my panties and bra. I heard Steve catch his breath. But there were more important things to concentrate on now. I closed my eyes and felt the familiar heat rush over me. It tingled down my spine and rushed over my limbs. The transformation was taking place.

And then, there I stood before him, a large grey wolf. I was smaller than the rest of my pack, but I was still much bigger than a normal wolf, my head level with Steve's shoulder.

_Doing alright? _Embry asked, slightly mocking.

_I hate you, _I answered, sourly. _This is hard enough without you in my head. Buzz off. _

_But it's so much fun…_

Embry was interrupted by a stern voice.

_Leave her alone. You ok, Leah? _Jake asked.

_Fine,_ I said, but I knew my tone was hesitant. _Now all I have to do is change back and explain_.

_Good luck_, said Quil, and I knew he was in earnest.

I willed the heat to leave my body, rushing out into the ground. I reared up on my hind legs, and Steve cowered away from me. I flinched at his reaction as I morphed back into myself.

Steve was staring at me with wild eyes, and not only because I stood before him without any clothes on. I struggled back into my abandoned clothes, but left my coat off. I always felt too warm after a transformation.

"What _was _that?" Steve asked, after a few moments of silence.

I balled my hands into fists.

"That was me," I said.

"But… but you… you were a…"

"A wolf. Yeah."

"I don't understand," Steve whispered.

"The legends of our tribe. They're all true. All about Taha Aki and the spirit walkers. He was the first to transform into a wolf, and it's been in our blood ever since."

I placed a hand on his forearm. He flinched away form my touch. I felt a stab of hurt pierce me. I was right: I _did_ repulse him.

"Maybe it would be easier if you sit down," I said. I pointed to a fallen log not far from us, and walked over to it. To my great relief, Steve followed.

I looked down at my hands balled up in my lap.

"This is who I am," I said.

"Who else knows about this?" Steve asked quietly.

"A lot of people, actually," I admitted. "My mom. Billie Black. The elders of the tribe. Sam."

Steve started at the name.

"Sam knows?" he asked.

I made a face.

"Sam was the first."

"The first to know?" Steve suggested.

I shook my head.

"No. The first to change."

"Are you telling me," Steve said, his voice strained. "That my little brother transforms into a… _wolf_?"

"Yeah," I said. "He's the Alpha of his pack, actually."

"There are more?" Steve whispered.

I nodded.

"About seventeen in all. You've met most of them."

"I have?" Steve gasped.

"At Sam's Christmas party. They were all there."

"Does Emily know?"

"Of course Emily knows," I said. "She was one of the first outsiders Sam ever told."

Steve suddenly gasped.

"Her scars…?"

I grimaced.

"Yeah. Sam lost control early on. It's hard to learn how to control what is happening to you, at the beginning. He didn't have anyone to help him with the transformation, and he didn't understand what was happening to him. It's pretty scary at first. He lost control of his temper, and transformed in front of Emily. It was an accident."

"Seventeen of you," Steve whispered. He seemed to be going into shock.

"Are you ok?" I asked, concerned. "I know this is a lot to take in."

"Why are you telling me all of this?" he asked.

I shook my head. I didn't want to give him too much information all at once.

"I'm not sure if you're ready for that yet. Maybe you should just take it slow."

He shook his head, snow flying off his dark hair.

"I want to know everything."

"Maybe you should just come to terms with the fact that I'm a werewolf first."

Steve choked.

"_Werewolf?_" he asked in a strangled voice.

I smiled wryly.

"See what I mean?"

He pondered that for a moment.

"I don't get why you're telling _me_. I mean, what do I have to do with all of this?"

"Well that's the weirdest part," I admitted.

"Weirder than the fact that you turn into a… a werewolf?"

I felt the edges of my mouth twist up in an ironic smile.

"Actually, we're not werewolves, technically. We're shapeshifters that just happen to transform into wolves. No links to the moon." I remembered the creepy old bloodsucker, Aro, saying as much to Edward. "But we just call ourselves werewolves. It's easier."

"Right, of course," Steve said absent-mindedly.

He must be terrified of me. He must see me as a monster, a freak. He didn't want me, I just knew it. My stomach twisted, and I felt sick. I risked a glace at his face, and my breath caught in my throat. He was looking at me with such a gentle, tender look on his face. I swallowed.

He reached up his hand, and trailed his fingertips lightly over my cheek.

"Why doesn't it surprise me that you're more than the ordinary, Leah?" he said.

I blinked in surprise.

"You're not totally repulsed by me?" I asked.

"Scared senseless? Yes. Confused? Yes. Repulsed? No. You're still you, no matter what you change into.

"Really?" I asked. "I've been so scared that you were going to run away screaming from what I am. I know it's kinda overwhelming at first."

"Well, it's not everyone who can say they know werewolves," Steve said, his mouth twisting into a small smile.

"And knows more than one. Are you sure you're ok with this?" I asked. I wanted to be sure he could handle the wolf thing before I moved on.

He nodded.

"I have a question though."

Uh oh.

"Ok."

"Does this happen all the time? Has there always been a bunch of wolves in our tribe and I just never noticed?"

I shook my head.

"It's only for the protection of the tribe. The werewolf gene is dormant, until the tribe is threatened."

"And the tribe's been threatened lately? I don't remember any scary stuff happening around La Push."

I rolled my eyes.

"Yeah, well you wouldn't, would you?" I asked. "We work hard to keep it all secret. The last pack was lead by Ephraim Black, Jake's ancestor. There wasn't a need for werewolves till now, because that's when _they_ came back."

I wondered if I should explain the Cullens to him, then thought better of it. Too much information at one time.

"They?"

"Our enemies. Only, it turned out they weren't our enemies, and we renewed the treaty that Ephraim made with them. Now they're our allies. But their presence caused the gene to reactivate. We had a werewolf population explosion."

Steve puzzled this explanation for a moment, then nodded.

"Aren't you scared of being a wolf?" he asked.

"I was at first, because I had no idea what was happening. And it was hard to control the transformations at first. Every time I got angry, I would just _burst_ out into being a wolf. I did it in front of my dad one time, and…" I swallowed hard. The look on Dad's face when his daughter had suddenly become a wolf was a think etched in my memory forever. It had also caused him to have a heart attack, and die later in hospital. It was one of my biggest regrets in life that I hadn't been able to control my temper in that one instance. I had worked very hard on control since then.

"But that's the thing," I continued. "I love it. Except for hearing my pack's thoughts, I totally love it. I love the power, the wind in my fur, the way I can run faster than anyone. It's the most amazing feeling in the world. And I would gladly die for my pack and for my tribe."

Steve seemed to be seeing me through new eyes.

"The whole transforming into a wolf thing… you get used to it," I assured him. "I've been doing it for four years now. It's as much a part of life as anything else."

Steve reached in his pocket, and held out the locket he had given me.

"May I?" he asked, quietly.

I nodded.

He leaned over, and fastened the catch at the back of my neck. His proximity sent shivers down my spine.

"Ok," Steve said after a moment. "So again, why are you telling me, if this is all supposed to be a secret? And why isn't it Sam who's telling me all this stuff? After all, he's my brother."

This was the hard question. The one I'd been rehearsing the answer to in my mind for three days now.

"Well, remember when I said that Sam dated Emily after me?"

Steve nodded.

"Well that's not exactly true. He broke up with me for Emily."

Steve hissed in sympathy.

"That's terrible. But what does this have to do with me? Unless I'm payback for Emily…?"

I frowned at the very idea.

"No. Of course not. But it comes down to the reason that Sam left me for Emily. He did it because he had imprinted on her."

"Imprinting? Like a baby bird on the first thing it sees?"

I smiled at the comparison.

"Actually, yeah. Kinda like that. Imprinting is this werewolf thing. It happens to some of us after we transform. We see a certain person for the first time after we transform, and _wham_. Destiny."

"Destiny?"

"I know. It sounds so dumb and cliché. But it's just one of those werewolf things that we don't understand. Like Taha Aki's third wife. Remember the story? She was his soul mate. That's what imprinting is. It's finding the person you _belong _to. Sam found Emily, and who was I to argue with destiny?"

"How many of the wolves are… imprinted?" Steve asked quietly.

I counted in my head. Sam, Jake, Quil, Jared, Paul, Caleb, me.

"Seven. Three in my pack alone."

"Your pack?"

"There are two separate packs. One is lead by Sam. The other by Jacob. Since Ephraim Black was the leader of the last pack we had, it was Jacob's right to be Alpha. But he didn't assert it until Sam threatened the Cullens. Or should I say, threatened Bella."

"Sam threatened Bella?" Steve looked confused again. "That nice girl we met skating?"

I frowned at the description of Bella. Steve really had no idea what she was.

"There were… complications at the time. Jake refused to hurt Bella, and since Ephraim Black was the Alpha of the last pack we had, and Jake is his descendant, he was the rightful Alpha. He was content to let Sam lead, until Sam asked him to do something that he couldn't bear to. So he broke away and formed his own pack."

"Sam seemed to be on good terms with this Bella when I saw them together."

"That's because of Nessie," I explained. "Everything changed when Jake imprinted on Nessie…"

"Jake _what? _Nessie's just a little girl!"

He had _no_ idea how little.

"It's not as weird as you think it is," I was quick to jump to my Alpha's defense. "Jake is going to be whatever Nessie needs, as long as she needs him. For now that's just elder brother and best friend. Later, who knows?"

"But I thought you said Jake was friends with Nessie's mom. What does Bella Cullen have to do with this?"

I saw where Steve was confused. I smiled.

"Bella _is_ Nessie's mom."

"But she looks younger than you!" Steve gasped.

"She _is _younger. Listen, there's a whole world of mythical creatures out there that you have no idea about."

Steve held up his hand.

"How bout we stick to you and me, ok? I can ask about the Cullens later."

"Good idea," I agreed. "Where were we?"

"Destiny," Steve said, his mouth curling up. I took courage from his almost-smile.

"Destiny," I agreed. It sounded so ridiculous to say it that way. I took a deep breath, and started to explain. "I never thought I was going to imprint. There's never been anyone like me in our history. Traditionally, all the wolves are boys. I'm the only female werewolf ever. And I thought maybe that meant I couldn't imprint, because Sam thinks that imprinting is the way to pass on our biological material to the next generation of little wolves. But then I saw you, and…." I trailed off.

"You imprinted on me," Steve realized.

I nodded.

"What does that mean?" he asked.

"It means that you're my missing puzzle piece. You're the answer my life has been lacking all this time. It means that you go before me in everything. It means whatever you want it to mean. If you want me, I'm yours. If you don't..." I looked down at my hands and swallowed hard. "If you don't, it means that I'll take whatever you can give me. I know I'm damaged goods, but I… I couldn't help it. It's not something I control. But if I was going to choose anyone, it would have been you anyways. I've been waiting for you for a long time."

"Soul mates, huh?" he said.

I made a face.

"I know, I know. But there's no other way to describe it."

"Do I get a choice in this?" he asked.

All my fears suddenly came crashing in on me. He wanted an out. He didn't want the freaky werewolf girl.

"Yes," I stuttered. "You have a choice, but I don't. There'll never be anyone else for me, as long as I live. That's the way imprinting works."

I could see Steve's adam's apple bob up and down as he swallowed.

"I… ah… I think we should go home now," he said getting up off the log.

"Steve?" I called.

"I want to go home, Leah," he said, his back to me.

I got up, and hurried to him, slinging my coat over my arm.

"Steve, what…?"

Then I caught a glimpse of his face. I had never seen it like that. His expression was steely, his glance cold and angry.

"I don't want to stay here any more. I think we had better go back to your car and go home."

And my world came crashing down.

_Author's Note: I know people wanted Steve to be a werewolf, and that was my original idea I promise, but I then I couldn't make it work with the lore. I mean, if two werewolves imprinted on each other how would the hearing each other's thoughts work? I dunno, it just seemed too complicated. Somebody else's story to write, not mine. _

_What did Steve think of Leah's confession? Why is he acting so strangely? What's with his sudden coldness? Wait till next chapter to find out! _


	8. Loving Someone

Chapter 8

Loving Someone Gives Them the Power to Break You

We drove all the way to Sam's house in a stony silence. I knew that I had been right – being a wolf was too much for Steve. He didn't want me, just like everyone else didn't. I was a reject, a wolf girl where there weren't supposed to be any girls. I had thought maybe everything was going to be ok when I imprinted, but I was wrong.

I pulled up next to Sam's perfect little Christmas card house. Steve unbuckled his seatbelt, and opened the door.

"Steve, wait," I begged.

"No, Leah," he said, and his voice was devoid of all emotion. His face, his wonderful, handsome face, was cold and impassive. "I can't."

He got out, and went into the house.

For one infinite second I stared at the front door of Sam's house. My mind was in turmoil. On one hand, I didn't want to push Steve. I didn't want to be the crazy stalker girl that wasn't wanted any more. On the other hand, I didn't want to loose him. He was my destiny.

I cut the engine, and got out of the car. Sam opened the door for me before I could knock.

"What happened?" he asked, his face troubled.

"I told him," I said, my voice hollow. "About being a wolf, about imprinting, everything."

"Then why does he look like someone has died?" Sam demanded.

I shook my head, feeling the tears well up in my eyes.

"Oh, Leah," Sam said softly. He reached out and pulled me into his arms. They felt comforting and warm. I clung to him, trying desperately not to cry. "I'm going to fix this," he promised, pulling away from me.

"He doesn't want me," I whispered. "He made that clear enough."

"No. Something else is going on," Sam said. He lead me into the house, his arm around my shoulder comfortingly. "And I'm going to find out. You stay here, and I'm going to go talk to him."

"I'm going to listen in," I threatened.

Sam smiled slightly.

"I'll leave the door open a little so you can hear."

I nodded.

Sam disappeared around the corner. I could hear his footsteps.

"Steve?" he said, knocking on the door. "Steve, I need to talk to you."

"Go away, Sam," Steve's voice was muffled.

"No. Open up."

The door creaked open. I leaned forward, thankful that my hearing was much better than a normal human's.

"What the heck happened out there?" Sam said.

"I'm sorry," said Steve. "I can't say here any longer."

"Why?" Sam demanded. "What are you running away from?"

Steve exhaled, and I knew that he would be running his hands through his hair in a nervous gesture.

"It's too dangerous. I can't stay here any more."

"_Dangerous?_" Sam demanded. "Do you mean the wolves? I know Leah told you about us."

"How could you neglect to tell me that you turned into a _werewolf_, Sam? I'm your _brother_!"

"It wasn't my secret to tell," Sam replied.

"But it was Leah's?"

"Yes, it was Leah's. You belong to her now, more than you do to me."

Steve blew out a breath.

"That's why I can't stay, Sam."

Sam made a frustrated noise.

"Why not?" he demanded. "Why can't you stay? What's so terrible about staying with Leah?"

I didn't need to strain my ears now; they were shouting.

"Because I think I'm falling in love with her!" Steve yelled back.

And there it was. He was in love with me. That knowledge seeped into me, and coiled around my heart like a glowing coal. If I could only convince him to stay, there was a chance for happiness.

"What's wrong with that?" Sam asked. "That's a good thing."

"No, it's not. She thinks I'm her destiny, Sam. Me. I can't be."

"Why not? We don't know how imprinting works, or why, but I'll tell you this much: you can't fight it."

"I can't be her soul mate," Steve said. "I'm not good enough for her. She deserves someone better."

No! There was no one better! And believe me, I had looked. Even if I hadn't imprinted on him, Steve would still have been the smartest, funniest, handsomest guy I'd ever known. I might even have fallen in love with him naturally, given enough time. I wanted to jump up and run to him and tell him that it wasn't true. That I deserved _him_ and no one else. But I held back.

"I think I'm in love with her," Steve said, softer now.

"Then what's the problem?" Sam asked.

Steve sighed.

"I have to go before this gets any more complicated!"

"So you're running away?" Sam demanded.

Steve groaned.

"No! You don't understand. I can't leave Marina."

I froze at the name. Marina? Who was Marina? I searched my memory for any mention Steve had made in the three weeks I had known him to anyone called Marina, but came up short.

"I thought she dumped you," Sam said.

"She did. Two months ago she came back."

"And you're still in love with her?"

Steve groaned again, low and anguished.

"No, that's not it at all. I thought I was. That's why I took her back. But now, with Leah… I've never felt this way before. I've never fallen so hard for a girl. But I can't leave Marina."

"But you don't love her any more," Sam argued. "You can't say with someone you don't love."

"I have to, Sam. Marina's pregnant. I can't leave her now, when she needs me. Would you have me be an even worse father than ours was?"

My mind was numb. It was as if someone had shot it full of morphine, and it was hard to think through the haze. Steve didn't want to leave his pregnant girlfriend by herself. It wasn't that he didn't want me, it's that he wanted to do the right thing. He was such a good man.

"Pregnant?" Sam gasped. "When did this happen?"

"She only told me before I left. She says she's six weeks along."

"The why did you flirt with Leah?" Sam asked, his tone hard. "Why did you act like your heart was free?"

There was a moment of silence.

"I know it was wrong. But I convinced myself that she didn't care anything for me. That it wouldn't matter, because I was only risking my own heart. I didn't guess that she felt anything for me."

"How could you?" Sam asked.

"Why do you care?" There was that steely tone to Steve's voice again. The one that I hated. "You're not her brother, or her father. You're her exboyfriend, who left her for her cousin. Who are you to lecture me on how to treat Leah Clearwater?"

"I know," Sam said, and his voice was filled with sadness. "I hurt her, and I'm the last person on earth who should be lecturing you for doing the same. But Steve, that's the thing: I hurt her, and I never want to see it done again. More than anything I want Leah to be happy. And I won't let you hurt her."

"I don't want to," Steve admitted. "Do you know how much I want to run to her house right now and beg her to forgive me and take me back? But I can't. I have to do my duty by Marina. I can't leave her."

"Then don't," I said, stepping into the room. In a split second of clarity, I had made my decision. I had to do what was best for Steve. He was all that mattered right now.

Both brothers turned to me. Steve's face was surprised; Sam's was not.

Steve's room was a mess. There was a suitcase on the bed, and clothes strewn around, as if he had been in the middle of packing.

"Leah, I…."

I shook my head.

"I heard everything, Steve. Everything."

"I'm sorry," he whispered to me. "But I can't leave her."

"I understand," I said. Somehow it was possible to keep my voice level, to keep my emotions in check. "You're a good man. You want to do the right thing."

"I thought it was just my own heart that I was risking. I was stupid, but I thought it was just me. And then you said those things about imprinting, and destiny, and…" Steve trailed off.

"You'll always be my destiny, Steve," I said. I looked straight at his piercing black eyes, and saw my own sadness echoed in them. "But I understand that you want to do right by your girlfriend. It's the honourable thing to do."

"I don't want to," He said, his eyes soft. I had to look away.

"I know what it's like to be left for destiny," I said, staring at my own socked feet. "And I would never wish that on anyone else."

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Sam wince.

"Can you forgive me?" Steve asked.

I gave a short, humourless laugh.

"I already have. I'm just glad I didn't scare you away, like I thought I did."

Steve ran his hands through his hair, which was already standing up on end from the repetitious action.

"What you are has nothing to do with this. I should never have played with your heart. I didn't mean to get this close."

"I told you: imprinting isn't a conscious decision. I didn't have a choice in the matter."

Steve reached out his hand to touch my cheek, but I shied away from him.

"Go," I said softly. "Go back to Marina and your child. Go back to your life, and I'll go back to mine."

"It won't ever be the same," Steve said softly.

The air caught in my throat, and I made a strange choking noise. _His_ life wouldn't ever be the same?

"You Uley boys sure did a number on me," I said. Then, very slowly, I walked out of the room. I didn't stop walking till I was at my car.

How I got home I'll never know. It seemed to me that I was in a dream. My mind was still numb, but I knew that sooner or later the painkillers would wear off, and then the ache of heartbreak would come. I had felt it before, but I knew instinctively that this would be ten million times worse.

When Sam had left me, he had hurt me, and hurt me badly. Before Steve, I thought that I would never recover from that. Sam had hurt me, but Steve had broken me. It seemed like a cruel joke, when I thought about it. The two men in the entire world who had the power to break me in half, and both had done it.

I didn't remember getting home, but I must have. I must have parked the car in the driveway, and gotten up to my room, but I don't remember it. I only remembered lying on my bed, still in my coat. And then the tears came. Hot, scalding tears soaking into the pillows and blinding me with their fierceness.

I could never see him again. He was the sun in my sky, and I would never see him again. I had been able to live when Sam left me. It was a horrible half life, but it had been life. I knew that without Steve I wouldn't be able to continue.

With the tears came the pain. Hot, scalding, burning. It tore its way down my throat and settled into my heart, eating it away. It felt as though I would never be whole again. My heart belonged to Steve, and he had taken it with him.

--------

I don't know how long I lay there until sleep came. Time had no meaning any more. I remembered how Bella Swan had been when Edward left her that one time. I had thought it was pathetic, the way she had gone on and on about it. I knew heartbreak, and I hadn't fallen apart like that. I thought Bella was being an overly dramatic little girl throwing a temper tantrum because she couldn't get her way. It hurt, yes, but you couldn't let it destroy your life. Now I knew better. I knew exactly how Bella felt. I would never look down on her again for her breakdown after Edward left. It felt as though nothing were worth doing any more. Like continuing on with life was just a big joke, a farce. It felt as though half of me were missing. Like Steve Uley had ripped half of me away and left me bleeding and broken. I couldn't pick up the pieces this time, like I had with Sam. There were no pieces left to pick up.

It almost made it worse, knowing that Steve loved me, and that he was doing the noble thing by going back to his pregnant girlfriend. Knowing that if it hadn't been for her, he would be with me. I wished I didn't know. I wished that I thought he didn't want me because of who I was, because I was a monster. That would have been easier to handle. I had been right all along: I wasn't meant to pass on my werewolf genes. I was the freaky wolf girl, the one who was _wrong_. I was twenty three and already I was damaged goods; who would want me now?

And I couldn't even get over him. I couldn't even say that there were more fish in the sea and get on with life. Because there would never be anyone else. Not ever, as long as I lived. You can only imprint once, and once you do, that's it. I couldn't find someone else because there _was_ no one else. Steve would be my soul mate, forever. No matter where he was or what he did, he would carry a piece of me with him, and I would never get it back.

There was a knock on my door. I hardly acknowledged it.

"Hey Lea, how'd it go?" Seth asked, walking in. He had his usual cheerful smile on. "We're all dying to know. Embry wanted to put bets on Steve's reaction, but Jake made him… Leah?"

I didn't look up.

"Please go away." My voice was dead. No emotion, no emphasis, nothing. Hollow, like the rest of me.

Seth sucked in his breath sharply.

"What happened?"

"Steve's going home. I don't want to talk about it."

"Not before I beat the tar out of him," Seth's normally happy face was twisted with anger.

I sat up suddenly.

"Seth, no! You can't!"

Whatever happened, Seth couldn't hurt Steve. Steve just _couldn't _be hurt in any way. This wasn't his fault, this was mine. I was the one that had to imprint on someone who wasn't available. I should have just stayed home from that party like I was planning on doing in the first place. If I had never seen Steve, none of this would have happened. He could have just gone home to Marina, and I could have continued on with my bitter half life, and nothing would have changed. Even that terrible gray, overcast life was better than the pain that ripped at me now, that seemed to eat away at my insides.

"I don't know what he did to you, Lea, but if he left you like this, he's going to pay for it." Seth's words were hard and angry.

"No, Seth, please. It's not his fault."

"It is if you're crying."

I shook my head, not wanting to see my pain and bitterness infect my cheerful baby brother. He was too pure, too good for that. I was the one who had to take all of this.

"I don't want you to get hurt," I said, thinking of the damage it would do his soul to take pleasure in inflicting pain on my Steve.

Seth snorted.

"I'm a werewolf, Lea. A fully grown werewolf that can take on bloodsuckers any day. I think I can handle one ordinary human."

I shook my head.

"Not physical hurt," I said. But it was too much trouble to explain. "Promise me you won't?"

Seth nodded, reluctantly.

"But that doesn't mean I forgive Steve."

The anguish washed through me again at the mention of his name, and I felt tears coming to my eyes.

"Please, Seth," I begged, not wanting him to see me like this. "Please go away."

Seth didn't go away. He reached out his long arms, and pulled me into them, hugging me tightly as a fresh wave of tears ran out of me. It felt as though a faucet had been turned on inside of me, and everything was flowing out, everything inside of me until I was hollow. There was nothing left inside me but pain, and the memory that for one sparkling moment, I had been _happy_. And that made it hurt more.

Seth stroked my back while I cried and whispered comforting nonsense in my ear.

"What happened?" he asked, when I was finally cried out. "Did he not want you, like you thought?" His question was blunt, but not unkind. After all, he had heard what I had been thinking, all my worries on the subject.

"He can't want me," I whispered. "He thought he was just hurting himself, not me too. He has to do the right thing, and so did I. I had to let him go. But it hurts so _much_."

"He had to go?" Seth asked.

"He couldn't leave her."

"Who?"

"His girlfriend. She's pregnant."

Seth hissed at the realization of what I was saying.

"What a… a… a _moron_!" Seth struggled with the words, and I knew that a dozen swear words had run through his head before he had picked one that was more tame.

"No," I said. "No, he's doing the right thing. He's going to be an amazing father."

"I'm so sorry, Leah," Seth said.

I buried my face in his shirt, and took another shuddering breath.

"I'm all alone again," I mumbled. "They always leave me all alone."

"No," Seth said softly. "You're not alone. You've got me, and the pack. We won't leave you. Not ever."

And I knew that that much, at least, was true. I still had my pack, my family. My idiotic, annoying, loving band of brothers. I felt a little sorry for them. They were going to have to feel all this hurt and betrayal as well. I wished there was some way to keep it all from them, to just take it on myself and not have to share it. I wished I didn't have to infect my happy-go-lucky brothers with my pain.

Loving someone gives them the power to break you. And Steve Uley had broken me good.

_Author's Note: Wow… dark. I always knew this was going to be a hard chapter to write, but I didn't know quite how hard until I started writing it. I'm not used to writing his kind of angst, and I needed to take breaks in between to do happy things and cheer myself up. _

_Poor Leah! She really has got the short end of the stick. She picked first one brother and then the other, and both of them messed her up pretty badly. I hated to do this to her, seeing as the original point of this story was to have Leah happy, but I realized that it had to be done, for the greater good of the story. _

_Leah's thoughts on Bella during _New Moon_ are my own. Not exactly impressed with how quickly she threw herself into depression when Edward left. But then, I've never been the overly dramatic type, and Bella really is. _


	9. Not Exactly

Chapter 9

Not Exactly Something You get Over Quickly

I didn't want to shift into my wolf shape. I didn't want the others to know how much Steve's leaving had affected me. I didn't want them to be burdened with my pain, like they had the last time with Sam. But it was inevitable. Sooner or later I would have to transform, and then they would get the full brunt of it. I would rather it have been sooner, if it had to be done.

I left my clothes in a small pile on the back porch, and shifted into my wolf form. I had been avoiding it for as long as I could, wanting desperately to keep my thoughts to myself, but I had forgotten how good it felt to be a wolf.

Everything was simpler as a wolf. Everything was about survival, about instinct. There were no complicated human emotions to cloud my thoughts. Just the pounding of my paws, the wind in my fur, the smell of cold and snow and frozen earth as I ran swiftly over it. I took in deep lungfuls of the clean, cold air, drinking it is as the scenery flashed past me. For once in these last couple of days I didn't need to think about the fact that my heart was just a smoking crater. It was still there, but it wasn't as important. Animals didn't worry about it as much as humans did.

_Hey Leah, we've missed you_, Embry voice cut through my thoughts, breaking my inner reflections on the pleasures of staying in wolf form. I knew that Jacob had done it once to escape heartache: stayed as a wolf for months and months and just _run_. The thought was becoming more and more appealing to me.

_I'm coming, _I answered, heading towards the rendezvous point. With a burst of speed I took off, running as fast as I can. The feeling of freedom was wonderful. I was just me and the earth and nothing else.

I caught a stray thought of Quil's.

_Yeah, I do need to run this fast,_ I snapped. _Some of us are good at it, remember? _

As usual, I was hiding my pain behind sarcasm and bitterness. I gathered my pain together, concentrating it on the hole where my heart had once been. Then, I carefully used the angry, hard emotions to build a barrier around them. High, thick walls that couldn't be penetrated, holding back the anguish like a dam held back a river.

_Ok, ok, I was just saying… Jake's not here yet either. No need to hurry or anything. _Quil grumbled.

_Coming_, Jacob said. _You ok, Leah? _

_Fine, _I lied.

_Yeah right, _Embry said._ We all heard that Steve left yesterday. _

The pain in my heart, that while I had been running was temporarily dulled, flared up again as strong as ever, and I felt my huge, wolfish eyes prick. The dam I was hiding my feelings behind developed a long, jagged crack.

I felt everyone wince.

_That bad?_ Quil asked.

_Worse, _I murmured, running through the events of my last meeting with Steve in my mind. It hurt so much to think of it, but I knew that it was better to get it all out to my pack brothers as quickly as possible.

_He did _what_?! _Embry demanded.

_He left. Permanently. _I felt my sadness leak into my words, no matter how hard I tried to keep them out.

_But he's your imprint. That's not the way things work, _Embry argued.

_It does when you're me. Nothing goes right with me. _

The dam that I had been keeping my emotions hidden behind broke, and a gush of pain and hurt and confusion poured out, before I could stem the tide, and build the barrier back up again. I was going to have to work on this.

Ahead of me and slightly to the right, I heard the anguished howls of Seth and Embry. They were crying with me. I whimpered. It was harder to keep control of my own emotions when my pack shared them with me.

There was a wave of angry swearing.

_We'll tear him apart for you, Leah. You know we will_, Quil said. He arrived in the clearing about the same time I did. He had been a lot closer.

I shook my shaggy head.

_You know that's not the answer, Quil_.

_We just want you to know that we _would_, _Jake said. _He's got four huge wolves to deal with. You don't mess with our pack sister that easily. _

I felt a well of emotion for these dumb boys. They wanted to help me, however misguided their attempts were.

_That's not going to solve anything,_ I reminded Jake.

_It would make me feel better,_ he grumbled.

_I'm going to kill him for what he's done to you_, Embry growled. Nobody_ messes with our pack. _

_You'll have to go through me first,_ said Seth. That hard, determined tone, so unlike his usual voice, was back. I hated it. I wanted him to go back to being my Seth, not this boy who seemed caught up in my bitterness.

_Seth, we talked about this,_ I reminded him.

Jacob ran into the clearing, coming to a halt beside me. He pushed his big head under mine in a wolfish hug. I leaned my cheek against the top of his head for a moment, taking in his offered comfort.

_You going to be ok? _He asked.

_No,_ I replied honestly_. But I can do my duty. That's what's important. _

Embry blew out of huffing breath.

_I still say we storm his house and drag him out to answer for what he's done_, he grumbled. But he wasn't serious any more.

_You can't hurt him_, I reminded Embry. _That would be worse. He's doing the right thing. _

_So says you_, Quil said sourly, but he knew I was right.

_I'm sorry guys, _I said regretfully. _I know what I was like last time something like this happened. I made you all miserable, and I don't want to do that again. I'll think about something else. _

_We're not telling you what to think_, Jake reminded me. _You're welcome to be miserable if you want. What happened to misery loving company? _

There was a hint of playfulness in his tone that I appreciated. He was trying to lighten the mood. Good old Jake.

But I held firm. I didn't want to infect them with my unhappiness. Especially Seth, who was so naturally cheerful, and Jacob and Embry, who were both so deliriously happy when they were with their imprints. I would just have to draw on their feelings of wellbeing to keep myself going.

_What's on the agenda today? _I asked, bringing the discussion back to the task at hand.

--------

I went through the next couple of days as if in a dream. I went to work and ate and slept, but my mind, and certainly my heart, wasn't in it. I just went through the motions, pretending nothing was wrong. But I was sure that I was pretty bad actor.

When I got home from work, there seemed nothing to do but sit on the couch. I dropped my purse by the stairs, and sat down, closing my eyes against the weariness that threatened to overwhelm me. It wasn't a physical exhaustion, although I hadn't been doing much sleeping. It was a mental exhaustion that seemed to creep into every part of me and make my mind and limbs heavy. I lay my head on the arm of the couch, but I didn't sleep.

A family had come into the office today, looking for a house. There were four children, one of them just a baby, and I had gotten to hold her while her mother took off her coat. Usually I'm not one of those girls who gushed over little kids, but the girl was so sweet, so tiny in my arms, that all of the sudden my heart had ached for one of my own.

It hurt so much to think that I was never going to have kids. I used to think about kids from time to time, when I was dating Sam. Of course, then it was him who had run into the house in my imagination, and kissed me quickly before flinging our daughter into the air. It was easy to replace Sam with Steve – they had the same oval eyes, the same turn to their mouths. Now the little girl in my imagination took off Steve's glasses and fiddled with them while he laughed at her.

I could imagine Steve playing in the snow with a little girl with long black hair, and a boy with a wide smile. I imagined myself watching from the window, then turning and picking up a baby from a bassinette and cradling her, crooning her to sleep. The picture was so real, so tangible. And I wanted it so much it hurt.

Not that I knew if I could even have kids. I had no idea how that worked with the changes my body had gone through to be come a wolf. But I certainly couldn't now that Steve was gone. There was no one else that could be the father of my children. The very thought of anyone else was repulsive, unthinkable. It was Steve or no one, for the rest of my life. So it looked like I was doomed to be lonely forever.

There was a sharp knock on the door, and I looked up suddenly. It had gotten dark while I sat.

"Who is it?" I asked, feeling only tired.

"It's me," Seth's voice came from the other side of the door. "I forgot my key. Let me in?"

I shuffled to the door and opened it.

"Surprise," Seth said, grinning. Behind him was my pack, with identical sheepish smiles.

"What are you all doing here?" I asked.

Quil held up a DVD case, then pointed to Embry, who was laden down with shopping bags.

"And we ordered pizza," Jake said.

"I don't understand," I said. What in the world were they all doing here?

Seth nudged Jacob.

"It was Jake's idea."

Jake looked embarrassed.

"Well, when Rachel and Rebecca were upset, they would always invite their friends over and watch movies and eat junk food. So we thought we'd give it a try."

"We brought ice cream," Embry said helpfully, indicating one of the bags he was holding.

I blinked. My pack – four huge clueless boys – had brought over ice cream and were going to watch movies with me?

Seth slung an arm over my shoulder.

"Come on, Lea. We wanted you to feel better."

"It's not a very good substitute," Quil said. "But we thought it might help."

"Plus, pizza!" Embry said enthusiastically. "How does that not make things better?"

I rolled my eyes.

"All you think about is food," I grumbled.

"Yup," he replied, unabashed.

The four boys brushed past me, and threw themselves onto the couch.

"We picked the soppiest movie in the store. Nessie helped," Jacob said, grinning. "She's coming by later, if that's ok. Thought you might want more girls around."

I looked around at my pack, who were sprawled on the couch and the floor.

"No offense, guys, but what are you doing here?" I asked.

Jacob frowned.

"I thought we made that clear. We're here to make you feel better."

"We know we're not the right guys to be doing that," Quil said. "But you're our pack sister, and when you're down we're all down. So let's get this chick flick on the ball."

"Yeah," Embry cut in. "If you hurt, we hurt. And it sucks."

I felt a rush of something warm shoot through me, from the top of my head right down to my toes. It seemed to be thawing out the part of me that had been frozen since my last conversation with Steve. My heart was still broken beyond repair, but I had stopped being a block of ice. I could even smile, maybe.

I tried it, thinking that my face might crack. First one edge quirked up, and then the other. It felt strange, to be smiling. But I hoped that it didn't look too forced.

"So this is all for selfish reasons?" I asked.

Embry nodded, grinning a wolfish smile.

"Purely selfish. We don't care what happens to you or that you're hurting _at all_."

"I thought as much," I said, airing that smile out again. It was still small and tight, but it was a start.

"That's right," Seth encouraged. "We want the nice happy Leah again."

Even Jake snorted. I rolled my eyes.

"You've got enough happy for the both of us, little brother," I said.

The doorbell rang, and I got up to answer it.

Nessie was standing there, shifting her weight from foot to foot.

She ran straight into my arms as soon as I opened the door, nearly knocking me over. For such a little girl, she had a lot of weight behind her.

"Oh Lea, I heard everything and I'm _so_ sorry!" she said.

"Gently, Renesmee," Bella cautioned behind her.

I stroked the top of her coppery curls.

"Not your fault, Ness," I said, ignoring Bella.

"I still feel bad. To have him leave after everything else that's happened to you. It's just too unfair!" Sometimes I forgot that even though Nessie acted like an adult, she was still just a kid, with a kid's strong sense of justice. Well the world wasn't fair, and nobody knew that better than me.

"How do you know?" I asked.

"Jake told me everything."

I sighed internally. I should have known. Jacob wasn't very good at keeping _anything_ from Nessie, never mind secrets.

"You go on inside, ok?" I said. "They're all waiting, and we've got ice cream."

Nessie's face lit up. Although she didn't really like human food as a rule, sugar was one thing she appreciated. She gave me another hug, and then went inside the house. I heard everyone welcome her, Jake's voice the loudest.

Bella stood off to the side, looking concerned. She was beautiful, as always. I remembered, with a flash, what she used to look like, before she turned leech. She had been pretty, in a quiet, muted sort of way. Brunette, with very pale skin, although not as pale was it was now. In contrast, her human skin looked practically rosy. And she had been clumsy, and a little dim, I thought. Now was she as stunning as a supermodel; graceful and elegant like one too. But somehow in all that change, she still looked like the old Bella, the girl Jacob had fallen so hard for.

I acknowledged her presence with a nod.

"Can I request she be back by ten thirty?" she asked in her clear, bell-like voice.

"Sure," I said. "I'll have Jake bring her back."

"That would be fine," she said.

We looked at each other for a moment, and I could see that she was taking me in. I tried to hide the emptiness I knew was in my eyes. We had never been, well, friends. Even when she was a human, she had still been a Leech Lover, the enemy, to me.

Suddenly, Bella reached out her hand and placed it on my arm. I could feel her cold skin leaking through the fabric of my shirt. It was only through years of practice that I didn't flinch away from it.

"I heard what happened," she said.

Of course she had. From Nessie, probably. Or from Edward fishing it out of Jake's head. I _hated_ that that bloodsucker could hear my thoughts. It was bad enough that the pack did when I was in wolf form. I didn't need someone else eavesdropping.

"From Nessie?" I asked.

She nodded her head.

"Yeah. And I can see it. In your eyes."

She probably could. She knew what heartbreak and abandonment looked like.

"I don't need your pity," I said, my voice hard.

Bella shook her head.

"I wasn't offering you pity. I was offering you empathy. I know how this feels."

And I knew that she did.

I gave a short, jerking nod.

"I'm greatful," I said reluctantly.

A small smile flitted over her face.

"I hope…," She paused, seemingly turning over her words. "I hope it turns out for you as well as it did for me."

"It won't," I said stiffly.

Our eyes connected, my dark brown to her light amber, and I knew that she was in earnest. There was no mocking in her direct gaze, no making fun of the poor pathetic wolf girl. I read only quiet understanding and acknowledgement of what I was feeling. And even coming from Bella Cullen, it was comforting.

I jerked my head forward again in a gesture of thanks.

She smiled.

"Please don't let her eat too much ice cream," she said softly. "She'll be up all night. I don't need to sleep, but she does."

I nodded again, a tiny smile escaping my lips. A hyper Nessie was not a pleasant sight.

"I will."

And then Bella left in her fancy sports car.

I stood at the open door, watching her drive away. Bella was the last person I had expected to connect with me in my present state of personal hell. But I had sort of always known that she knew how I felt. I just didn't think she would care.

A small hand fitted into mine.

"You come, Lea?" Nessie asked. "We're going to start the movie. The boys picked a good one. With my help, _of course_."

I looked down at the girl who I had come to call my friend, and then nodded, letting her pull me inside.

I wasn't better, and I didn't think I would ever be whole again, but this was a start.

_Author's Note: I'm so gutted I screwed up my record. I didn't post yesterday! Possibly because this chapter was only two pages as of yesterday, and I had to go to a church potluck at night, which meant cooking stuff most of the day. So I'm posting it today with many apologies and promises of sticking to my guns until this story is finished. _

_Wow, lots of reviews for last chapter! That makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. A lot of unhappy readers, though. Sorry, guys. Steve had to leave for the sake of the story. A lot of people said that they liked the team dynamic in the last chapters, so this chapter is all about the team. I'm assuming that the pack is very important to Leah – those boys have become her family. _

_This chapter was written to "Bella's Lullaby" from the Twilight movie. I so love that piece of music! It's so pretty and light, and yet it had just the right edge of melancholy to it. I must have listened to it like ten times while I was writing this. _


	10. Local La Push Soap Opera

Chapter 10

The Local La Push Soap Opera

I drove home from work slowly. It was dark and the roads were icy. I scowled at the electrically lit snow as I drove past. January was the worst month – still cold and snowy, but devoid of the promise of Christmas; always dark; no holidays; and no end in sight. Especially not for me. This was going to be the first year of the rest of my lonely and pathetic existence. I wasn't exactly looking forward to it.

I pulled up to my house, and slowly reversed into my driveway, being careful of the ice that thickly layered the asphalt. There was a conspicuous red SUV parked on the other side of the road, but I tried not to let its flashy colours distract me as I backed in. It took all my concentration not to let my car slip.

I sat inside the warm cab for a few moments after I had cut the engine, unwilling to step out into the cold. My hand slipped into my pocket, and I fiddled with the locket that was my only remembrance of Steve, besides the picture I had drawn of him. I didn't want to wear the necklace; jewelry wasn't a good idea as a rule when you could burst out of one form into a much larger one at any moment. But I liked to have the locket close to me most of the time. I brushed my fingers over the cool metal, letting the repetitive action calm me. I was surprised that the design on the front wasn't worn away already, I had rubbed it so often.

With a sigh, I got out of my car, and grabbed my bag. It was snowing again. I fumbled for my keys, my cold fingers dropping them. I caught the keys, but the locket that had been in my pocket fell to the ground, shining brightly against the snow.

"Darn it!" I growled under my breath, stooping down to pick it back up.

Fingers reached for the necklace, and deftly picking it up. I looked up, surprised, and then my heart stopped. There, in front of me, with snowflakes in his black hair, and an uneasy smile on his perfect face, was Steve.

My breath came out in a _whoosh_, and my heart began to pound double speed. With a sudden crash, all the pieces of my broken heart came together violently, and I nearly staggered back from the violence of the action. Just being in his presence made me feel whole again; the part that I had been missing was finally here.

I knew that soon he would be gone again, and my heart would be in pieces just like last time. I kept my emotions carefully behind the dam that I had built up for them.

He held out the necklace to me, letting the pendant dangle, its gold surface catching the light.

"You should take more care of this," he said.

I stared at him for a whole minute, just drinking him in. He looked as good as ever – better, in fact. I my eyes traced his face, his russet skin, his dark eyes and thick brows and perfectly shaped lips, the way his hair fell into his eyes. I let my gaze trail down his black wool coat and red scarf, right down to his leather shoes. I took in all of him at once, committing him and this moment to memory. Someday, this would have to be enough for me.

"You're here," I breathed.

A smile quirked up the edge of his lips. I remembered how they felt on mine, soft and yet insistent.

"I'm here," he confirmed.

I held my emotions firmly in check, and willed my voice not to shake. I couldn't afford to let my emotions go. It would only hurt more when he left.

"Why?" I whispered. My voice sounded weak. I cleared my throat, and then tried again. "Why are you here?"

His face fell.

"Didn't you want to see me?" he asked softly.

As if he could ever think that! It was his name burned onto my heart, now and forever. Nothing would ever change that, no matter where he went or what he did, or how much time had passed.

I shook my head, trying to comprehend his logic in coming back here, only to break my heart again.

"I don't understand. Why did you come back?"

His dark eyes bored into mine.

"I came to see you," he said. He ran a hand through his hair. "I can't get you out of my head. I think about you all the time, I dream about you at night, no matter what I do, I can't stop thinking about you. I couldn't stay away."

It was like heaven, hearing those words come from his mouth. I closed my eyes and savoured them, storing them up as a balm for the aching crater that would be all that was left of my heart again when he left.

But the words weren't right. He shouldn't be saying those things. Not to me. He had his duty, and it was only making this harder for both of us if he kept coming back.

"What about Marina?" I asked. I hated to remind him of the reason he left me heartbroken, but I knew it was the right thing to do. He couldn't leave her all alone with a baby coming. "Did you leave her?"

A huge smile broke over Steve's features, and it was like a ray of sunshine had suddenly struck me. I felt warm all over, despite the cold weather.

"Actually, she left me. After telling me that she's been cheating on me. With my college roommate no less. And that the baby wasn't mine after all."

I felt dizzy. It was as if I had been carrying around a massive weight all this time, a huge burden that I had thought would never be lifted. And suddenly, it was gone, and I was free. The doors to the cage were opened, the clouds parted, the sun streaming through. I felt lightheaded at the shock of his statement.

"Not yours," I whispered, as if to confirm his words. To make sure that he was really saying them, that it wasn't just my imagination.

Steve nodded, his smile widening.

"I'm under no obligation. I didn't have to stay with her. In fact, she didn't want me. I'm free.

"So to answer your question, Leah, I came back here to ask you – no, to beg you –to forgive me. I know I've hurt you, and I know that I've been a selfish ass. I was stupid and I broke your heart, but please," he sank to his knee in the snow. "I'm begging you on bended knee. Forgive me?"

There was no thought, no need to deliberate. I hardly gave him time to rise from his knees before I threw myself in his arms, nearly knocking him over in the process. The dam my emotions had been held back with broke into a million pieces, but I didn't care. I let it. It didn't matter.

I was sobbing, with relief, with the sudden release of my carefully pent up emotions. I was crying, and then I was laughing, my smile mixed in with the tears on my face. It took me a minute to regain my composure enough to look up at him.

I fit so perfectly into his arms, despite our bulky winter attire. It was like we really were two puzzle pieces that could only fit together with each other. He belonged to me, and I to him, and that was that.

He pulled me closer, his hands splayed against my back. I tangled my fingers into his hair.

"Does that mean I'm forgiven?" he asked, smiling.

"You know you are," I replied.

He took his arm away from me, and I instantly regretted the loss of the warmth. He held up the locket.

"You dropped this," he said.

I laughed.

"Yeah, I did."

"May I?" he asked, an echo of his words before.

I nodded.

He reached behind my neck, and fastened the locket on. His cold fingers brushed against my skin, and I shivered.

"There," he said. "It's where it ought to be."

"I didn't want to wear it, in cast I had to shift quickly and couldn't take it off," I explained. "I didn't want to break something so precious. But I kept it close with me."

"Good."

He smiled down at me, and then reached up to gently stroke my cheek in a familiar gesture.

"'I took the road less travelled by,'" he quoted softly, the familiar passage he had said to me once before. "'And that has made all the difference.' You are my road less travelled. And it has made all the difference."

I saw his eyes travel down from my eyes to my lips. I smiled.

He leaned down, and his lips were on mine. It was not like I remembered from the first time we had kissed; it was better. His lips molded to mine so perfectly, moving against mine in perfect tandum. They were silky soft and gentle at first, hesitant, seeking permission. I gave it gladly.

"I love you," I whispered again his lips.

"I love you back," he answered, before making sure that I wasn't able to speak again.

The tone of his kisses changed. From gentle and seeking, they became more urgent, more insistent. I could taste the heat in them, and I matched it with my own. Steve left my mouth, and began to kiss my cheeks, my nose, my jaw. He trailed kisses down my neck, and I tilted my head to give him better access.

"Steve?" I said breathlessly.

"Mmmm," he responded.

"I think we'd better go inside."

Steve grinned at me, a wicked gleam in his eye.

"I think that's a good idea," he said.

-------

I woke slowly, not wanting to surrender to consciousness. I was warm and comfortable, and pleasantly sleepy. I stretched, and opened my eyes, glancing over to the other side of my bed. It was empty and the sheets cold. I frowned. Surely I hadn't dreamed all that?

I rummaged around for some clothes, and then wandered downstairs. Steve turned to me from his place at the stove as I walked in.

"Hey sleepy," he said.

I smiled, and fit myself under his arm.

"Hi," I replied.

He kissed the tip of my nose.

"You're incredible, you know that?" he said.

"How so?" I asked.

"Well, you forgave me even though I was an idiot, you were still wearing my locket even though I left you, and…" he leaned over a whispered the last sentence in my ear, "You have a … _wild_… side I wasn't expecting."

I blushed crimson.

"Well I am a wolf you know," I said.

He grinned.

"I know." He glanced back at what he had been doing before I had come in. "Hungry?"

I hadn't noticed until he had mentioned something, but I was starving. As if to collaborate this fact, my stomach growled loudly.

We both laughed.

"I'll take that as a yes," he said. "I made pancakes. You want some?"

I nodded eagerly, pulling out two plates and sets of cutlery.

They were delicious. Golden, fluffy, light, with a hint of maple syrup.

"You never told me you could cook," I accused, around another bite.

Steve shrugged, amused.

"You never asked. Besides, _someone_ had to make sure Sam was fed when we were kids. Pancakes were my specialty. We practically grew up on them."

I shot an envious glance at the piles of golden cakes on my plate.

"How do you get them not to burn?" I asked, thinking of my own attempts at this particular breakfast food, and how disastrously they had turned out.

"Secret," he replied.

I rolled my eyes.

"If you don't want to share your wealth of culinary knowledge, then fine. Hoard all the pancake secrets why don't you."

He laughed again. I loved the way he threw his head back, his eyes sparkling and his face alight with mirth. I vowed that I would get him to laugh more often, just so I could watch. His laugh was infectious, and I couldn't help but join in.

We ate in a comfortable silence. When I was finished, I started piling dishes in the sink for washing. Figuring that they would have to be done sometime, I ran the water and began to rinse bowls of batter.

Steve's arms came around my waist, his lips on my neck again. It was _extremely_ distracting, moving my thoughts away from all things food related.

"Steve," I said, a little helplessly. "The dishes."

"Leave them for tomorrow. It's Saturday."

Saturday. Seth had a hockey game on Saturday, I remembered dimly, Steve's kisses making me feel dizzy agian. Seth! My brother! The last thing I wanted was my baby brother walking in on us, I though with a horrified grimace.

"What about Seth?" I asked.

Steve leaned close to my ear and whispered, his warm breath sending shivers down my spine.

"He phoned to say he's staying over at Colin's house. I told him that would be a good idea."

I put the dishcloth down and surrendered, turning in his arms.

I wasn't expecting it when he swept me up and carried me upstairs.

------

When I woke this time, Steve was beside me, his arm thrown around my shoulders. I nestled into the warmth of his chest.

"Your nose is cold," he muttered.

I giggled.

"You're awake."

"So're you," he replied, stroking my hair.

We were silent for a long moment.

"You know what Marina told me?" he said suddenly.

I twisted around so that I could see his face.

"What?"

"She told me that she knew that she was pregnant before she came back to me, but she knew that I would stay with her if I thought the baby was mine. That I had more money than the baby's actual father, so she picked me instead."

I grimaced.

"What a horrible thing to say."

"Yeah. Well, it would have been, if I wasn't past caring. I think I drove her to confess, actually. I wasn't exactly emotionally present after I left you."

I shuddered to remember that dark time when Steve wasn't with me.

"I left my heart back in La Push," Steve murmured. "And she knew it."

I grinned.

"That should be the title of a soap opera," I teased.

"Nah," Steve drawled. "If they really wanted to make a show about this place, they would feature the giant werewolves running around."

I snorted.

"As if anyone would believe that."

"I'm glad," Steve said.

I gave him a strange look.

"About Marina," he clarified. "No one should be born whose father doesn't want to stay with their mother. I would have gone my whole life resenting that kid for taking me away from you. And I'm glad Marina came clean. Boy, she and Joell deserve each other." He chortled darkly.

I didn't press the issue. I didn't much care to hear about Marina.

"I'm glad you came back," I said, leaning my head back against his chest. "I wasn't whole without you."

Steve touched the locket around my neck.

"I'll stay as long as you want me," he replied.

"Forever," I said, with certainty.

Steve laughed.

"That's good, because I applied to teach at the high school here."

I raised my eyebrow.

"You did? But you used to work in a fancy private school."

"All the better to bring my fancy education to those who need it," Steve said. "I hope in coming home I might be forgiven."

"You're really staying?" I asked, half afraid of the answer.

Steve kissed my nose.

"Of course. If I'm your other half, you're mine."

I settled back into his arms, content.

"Oh," Steve said suddenly. "I was meaning to ask you, before we got… _distracted_… what did Seth mean when he said he would 'hear all about it anyways' on the phone?"

I choked.

"He said _what?_"

"He said he was surprised I was back in town, but he would hear all about it anyways. You don't tell your brother everything, do you?"

I made a face.

"I don't have much of a choice. Pack mind, you know. We're all connected. They hear all my thoughts."

And then I realized what I was saying, and blushed to the roots of my hair. The last thing my stupid pack brothers wanted was an instant replay of my night with Steve. And I certainly didn't want to share particular things with them. I would have to try very hard to keep it out of my mind from now on. Although, as Claire and Nessie grew, it was only going to get worse for all of us.

Steve considered my words for a moment.

"That's weird," he said.

"You have no idea," I said, thinking about the time I had dreamed I was kissing Bella, after Jacob had thought about it for two days straight.

The same idea I had about sharing with my pack occurred to Steve. He grimaced.

"They probably don't want these particular images, do they?" he asked.

"I sure hope not," I answered. "Hazard of having a girl in the pack. I'm attracted to men. They just have to deal with it. You'll be lucky if I can convince them not to kill you."

"They want to kill me?" Steve asked.

I smiled.

"I had to talk them out of it the first time. Just remember, buster, I've got four superhumanly big wolves for pack brothers."

Steve gulped.

"It's a good thing I plan on treating you right from now on," he said.

He claimed my lips again, and I sighed happily.

_Author's Note: maybe I should have issued a fluff warning at the beginning of this chapter. But I was afraid it would give too much away too suddenly. Yay, Steve is back!! I'm happy about it! Congrats to everyone who guessed that I wouldn't leave Leah unhappy forever. That really wasn't the point of the story, was it?_

_Thank you to everyone who reviewed and left their comments about the story. I'm glad I've convinced at least a few people to think differently about Leah, and – I dare say – love her like I do. Oh, and for the record, I've decided that if I were going to marry anyone in the Twilight universe, it wouldn't be Jacob any more, it would be Seth. _

_I know this seems like the end of the story, and it sort of is, but I think I'm going to write a little epilogue tomorrow, just to finish things off. I want to get back to my Doctor Who story as soon as this one is finished, but I can't help drawing it out another day. It's been so much fun! _


	11. Epilogue: Pretty Good to Me

Epilogue

Happily Every After Sounds Pretty Good to Me

"Are we ready yet?" Steve said impatiently.

I rolled my eyes.

"_Yes_, Steve, I'm ready to go now."

Steve grinned at me, and kissed me gently. It was just a brush really, and over much too quickly for my liking.

"You look beautiful," he said, smiling.

"Aw, gross, are you guys kissing _again_?" Seth groaned from the top of the stairs.

I glared at my little brother. He could be a real pain sometimes.

"Yes," Steve said. "We're kissing again." And he leaned down and pressed his lips to mine once again. I didn't let him get away so easily this time. I flung my arms around his neck and pulled him closer, forcing him to prolong the kiss. Not that he complained much.

Behind us, Seth made a disgusted noise.

"I'm waiting outside until the mushy stuff is over," he said, stomping out the door.

Steve and I both laughed.

"Mushy stuff is never over," I said.

Steve nodded, grinning.

You'd think after a whole year of living in the same house as us, Seth would have gotten used to the 'mushy stuff', but apparently not. He was still cringing whenever Steve and I showed any sort of affection. Actually, I purposefully went out of my way to be more affectionate around Seth, just to annoy him. My little revenge for the fact that I couldn't exactly keep secrets from him.

"We better go, or we're going to be late," I reminded Steve. He reluctantly detangled himself from me.

"I suppose you're right, although it's not like I've never kept Sam waiting before."

I made a face.

"If we don't get there soon, all the food will be gone. Seventeen werewolves, remember?"

"Right, right," Steve said. He slipped into his coat, and then offered me mine.

I started to walk towards my car, but Seth stopped me.

"We have to walk. It's a tradition."

I raised an eyebrow.

"Since when is it a tradition? Just cuz we did it last year doesn't make it a tradition."

"Sure it does," Seth said with a grin. "We walk Sam's Christmas party. You wanted to last year."

"Aw, come on," Steve encouraged me. "It's beautiful out here, and not too far."

"What side are you on?" I demanded, elbowing him in the ribs playfully. He caught my gloved hand and tucked it under his elbow.

"My own," He said.

Seth rolled his eyes.

"I'm going on ahead. You guys are giving me toothache." He started running in the snow sliding every couple of steps, a huge silly grin on his face.

"He's never going to get used to us, is he?" Steve asked.

"He'd better," I grumbled. "It's not like it's going to change. In fact, it's going to get worse pretty soon."

Steve's eyebrows came together in a look of adorable confusion, and, rather startlingly, a hint of panic.

"What?"

"Nessie," I clarified. Steve knew all about the Cullens being bloodsuckers now, and about how special Nessie was. "She's going to be grown up in a few years. She already could pass as a sixteen year old, and Jake's started to notice."

"And Seth's going to have to get used to the mushy stuff," Steve concluded with a smile. "He'll be hearing a lot more of it."

"Exactly," I agreed.

We turned the corner, walking side by side in the snow. It was a beautiful sunny day, and the sunlight was glistening off the blanket of new snow that had fallen during the night. The effect, along with the fur trees lightly frosted and the clear blue sky, was stunning.

"It's sort of like an anniversary for us, isn't it?" Steve said. His breath came out in a puff of smoke.

"Is it?" I asked.

"Yeah. Sam's Christmas party. One year ago today, we met."

"It's not the same day as last year," I commented.

Steve rolled his eyes.

"You know what I mean. The Christmas party. Sam's house. You. Me."

I laughed.

"Yeah I know what you mean. One year ago today I had my whole world turned upside down and backwards."

"Isn't it great?" Steve joked.

We turned the corner, and Sam and Emily's Christmas card house came into view. The front door opened wide, and Emily appeared, waving.

"Hurry up, you're late!" she called.

Steve started running, pulling me with him. I stumbled on the slippery snow, and nearly pulled him down with me. Steve steadied me, and we both started running again, making lousy time on the rough ground. We were both out of breath from running and laughing by the time we got to the door.

Emily was laughing too.

"Sam's been asking for you every five minutes, Steve," she said, shaking her head at us.

"It was Leah," Steve said, shooting me an accusatory glance. "She took forever to get ready."

"Did not," I shot back.

"Did too," Steve said, before rushing in to find his brother. As he turned, I saw the half nervous expression return to his face.

Emily relieved me of my coat, and I gave her a big hug.

"You're looking better," I said.

Emily grimaced.

"I told you, it was just a little cold."

"Whatever, Em. You always downplay things."

She mock scowled at me.

"Sure, Dr. Clearwater," she said. "When did you get your medical degree?"

I laughed. The last year had repaired the ties of friendship between me and my former best friend. We were well on our way to becoming best friends again, now that the barrier of Sam was out of the way. I slipped my arm around her waist, and we walked into the warm, cheerful kitchen together.

Like last year, there were werewolves on every surface of the living room. Nessie waved to me from her position perched on the arm of the sofa, with Jacob's protective hand on her knee. I waved back.

"Won't be long now, will it?" I asked.

Emily followed my gaze.

"At the rate she's growing, and the looks Jacob is giving her, not long at all."

I gave the two one last despairing glance, and went over to the bassinet that sat on the kitchen table.

"Hey sweetie," I crooned. Levi, Emily's nine month old son, lay there, contemplatively sucking on his fist. He had Emily's even features and Sam's almond shaped eyes. A little tuft of hair stood straight up on his head, proving that he definitely was a Uley. None of those boys could make their hair behave.

"Can you say 'Hi Auntie Leah'?" Emily asked, bending over the baby with me.

I reached down and scooped Levi out of his bed, propping him up against my shoulder. I kissed his downy head, and he favored me with a toothless smile.

"Practicing for when you have your own?" Emily teased.

I made a face at Emily over the baby's head.

"We don't even know if I can have kids yet, Em."

"Well you haven't been trying, have you?"

"Not exactly." I looked down at the newest member of the Uley family, and remembered my vision of a family with Steve. "Maybe some day." I turned my attention back to Levi. It wasn't hard to let the tiny thing capture your heart. He had stolen mine away almost the hour he was born.

"Aren't you just precious?" I crooned at him.

Emily grinned.

"I think so. But I think I'm a little bias."

I laughed.

"A little?"

Emily held her arms out, and I handed Levi to her.

"I think he looks just like his daddy," she said.

"And his uncle," I agreed.

"Can I hold Levi?" Nessie asked. She had come to stand beside me.

"Sure," Emily answered, surrendering her son to Nessie's competent hands. Nessie held the baby expertly and with grace, like she did most things. I looked over, and caught a strange look in Jacob's eye, as he watched Nessie hold the baby.

Nessie had grown a lot in the past year. From the physical appearance of a thirteen year old that she had been at this time last year to the physical appearance of a sixteen year old. She was truly turning into a beauty. Levi caught one of her shoulder length copper curls in his fist and attempted to put it in his mouth.

"No, no, Levi," she said, carefully untangling his grasp on her hair with her free hand. "We don't eat hair, do we?"

Sam and Steve walked into the living room together then. Sam had a huge smile on his face, but Steve looked a tad nervous. His expression confused me.

"Nessie," Emily said. "Why don't you take Levi and sit down? He's awake now, and wants to get some attention."

"Good idea," Nessie said with a grin. With Levi in her arms, she walked back to the sofa. Jacob got up, leaving a spot for her.

"You don't have to do that, Jake," she said.

Jacob shrugged.

"You've got a baby. Don't want you to topple over or anything. Besides, it's more comfortable."

"Whatever," Nessie said, taking his seat. Jake sat himself on the arm of the sofa right beside her.

I caught the same half longing, half possessive look on Jake's that had been there earlier. I grinned widely. Oh yeah. It wouldn't be long now.

Even thought people were still talking and laughing, it felt like they were waiting for something. Even Emily. She was leaning against the counter in the kitchen, where she had a good view of the living room. A smirk formed on her face.

"What's going on?" I asked aside to her.

"Going on?" she asked, her eyes wide and innocent. "What do you mean?"

"It feels like everyone is waiting," I replied. "Did I miss something?"

Her smirk grew, but she didn't say anything.

I frowned.

"Fine, don't tell me anything," I said. I moved more into the living room area, hovering on the edge of things.

"Hey everyone, can I have your attention?" said Steve.

I looked up, surprised. Steve was usually quiet at these sort of functions. What was going on?

"As you know," Steve said. "It was a year ago today at Sam's Christmas party that Leah imprinted on me."

I blinked. What was he saying? More importantly, why was he saying it to everyone? Steve was reserved, not liking to draw attention to himself, and here he was purposefully calling out to everyone. How strange.

"You might call this an anniversary of sorts," Steve continued. "And while I'm sure some of you haven't forgiven me for a certain incident after that – " he shot a glare at Embry, who glared back. Embry hadn't given up on his threat to beat Steve up if he left again. " – I think it's safe to say that you all know how much in love with Leah I am."

He crossed the room, and came to stand beside me. He took my hand and kissed it tenderly. I was frozen in place, my heart thumping out an uneven rhythm. Was he going where I thought he was going with this?

He drew me close, and looked into my eyes, speaking quietly now as if to only me.

"You're the most wonderful, the most unique girl I know. You've forgiven me for all the stupid stuff I put you through, and you've made me happier than I've ever been."

He sank down on one knee in front of me.

My hand flew to my mouth in a gesture of shock.

"I knelt in front of you once before to ask you something very important, and your answer was yes. I'm hoping this time it will be too. Leah, will you marry me?"

My body was frozen, but my mind was whirring it was going so fast. Marry Steve? Marry the love of my life, my soul mate, my other half? Marry him? Of course! There was no question. There was no need to think about anything.

But my body was still frozen in shock. Everyone was looking at me expectantly, and the moment was dragging on, and I still hadn't moved at all. I forced myself to take my hand away from my mouth.

"Of course," I choked out. "Of course."

Steve's grin lit up the room. He rose from his knees, and pulled me into a huge hug. The room erupted in clapping and cheering. There were even a few wolf whistles, which I found ironic, considering the company.

"You really want to marry me?" I asked, pulling away so that I could see his face.

"Of course," he said, echoing my words.

Then he kissed me, wrapping me in his arms again. I pulled him closer and let all the love I felt for him pour out of me.

It ended too soon. Steve pulled away, and produced a box from his pocket.

"Here," he said. I opened it, and gasped at the ring inside. It wasn't ostentatious or showy, but it was just right. A simple circle of gold with a small diamond in the centre. The diamond caught the light and shot it out in a million tiny diamonds as I twisted the box in my hands. Steve took the box from me, and carefully pulled the ring from its place in the satin cushion. He then slipped it on the fourth finger of my left hand. It felt heavy and foreign there, the cool metal a reminder of what had just happened. Proof that this all wasn't some dream.

"Do you like it?" he asked.

"It's perfect," I replied. And it was.

Sam clapped me on the back, breaking our embrace.

"Welcome to the family!" he said.

I laughed.

"Thanks Sam."

Sam gave me a hug, then surrendered me to Emily.

"I'm so happy," she whispered in my ear as she hugged me. "Now we can be sisters, just like we always should have been."

She was right, I realized with a grin. Now we could not only be comfortable around each other, we would be family. Emily as my sister – I could handle that. I laughed and nodded.

Everyone was crowding around and thumping Steve on the back and giving me hugs.

"Can I see the ring?" Kim asked. I held out my hand, and all the girls crowded around to admire it.

Nessie handed Levi back to Emily, and took my hand to admire the ring.

"It's lovely," she said, absently twisting around the braided bracelet that was the Queleute version of a promise ring. I shot a knowing glance at Emily.

Claire pulled at my hand, and I lowered it so the six year old could see it properly.

"It's so pretty," gushed Claire. "I want one just like it!"

I gave Quil a significant look over her head. He blushed.

"Someday," I promised her.

"You can get married in a white dress like a princess!" Claire continued, obviously captivated by the idea of a wedding. "Can I come? I've never been to a wedding."

"Course you can," I said. "In fact, I'm counting on you to be a flower girl."

Claire seemed enchanted by the idea. She bounded over to Quil.

"Leah says I can be her flower girl, Quil! And I'll get a princess dress and carry a basket of flowers, and walk in front of her."

"I heard," Quil said, ruffling her hair affectionately.

Steve looked past the huge werewolves that were crowding around us both.

"Do we get to see each other again until the wedding?" he joked.

I grinned, and pushed my way past the various people.

"Excuse me, coming through, I wanna see my fiancé, if nobody minds." I playfully elbowed and shoved my way through the towering werewolves and slipped into Steve's arms. He rested his head on the top of mine.

"Merry Christmas," he said softly.

I grinned.

"That depends."

"On what?" Steve asked, pulling away so that he could see my face.

"On whether you kiss me or not."

And he did.

_Author's Note: It's over. How sad. Well, this has been a good story, and I've enjoyed writing it. I'm glad it's out of my head now, LOL. I can go back to writing normal stories without having to worry about this one circling round and round. _

_Thank you so much to everyone who left comments and encouragements about this story. You've all really helped me formulate what I wanted this to become. Not to mention it's made it a lot of fun. I've discovered from this that given enough time it _is_ possible for me to write a chapter every day. Not to mention having reviews to look forward to every day is really great. _

_Oh, and Merry Christmas everyone! _


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